Boulter trouBle

I worked on this all night

2012-01-28T08:49:00.002-07:00

I'm not one of those women that wake up, roll out of bed, throw something on, put a *pretty in my hair and have it actually pass for "ready for the day".
Oh, how I wish I could.
As you can see, my hair prohibits that.
This is what I look like when I wake up. And based off the picture, can you even imagine what my breath smells like?
Well, I get the pleasure of tasting it.

Sorry. TMI?

And, I have no idea what I did to my chin last night.
See the big dried blood mark? I have blood all over my hands.

I can't even imagine the stuff I might do if I took Ambien.

Hopefully my bedhead doesn't scare you away.

Happy Saturday!

* a pretty is what we call anything that can be
used to put up a ponytail, or of the like.

~a

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walk-in closet

2012-01-26T13:09:00.006-07:00

I need to broaden my music pallet.
Let me tell you what I DONT like to listen to.

Daughtry (Sorry Xazmin)
Nickel Back
Rihanna
Nicky Minaj (i dont even care if thats not how I spell it)

I dont mind country. I used to listen to it a lot when I was in high school and then when I was in college. At Snow. In Ephraim.
For those of you that are not familiar with Snow College or Ephraim, just know this: Turkey Farms.
So, Country music is Ok. But, I have yet to find a country artist or song that I will want to listen to over and over and over.
However, I do believe that as far as the music industry goes, the nicest people are Country Music Artists.

Rant over.

I rarely listen to the radio. I HATE it.
I like to listen to little golden nuggets of "never heard before" music stylings.

So, maybe you are thinking, "Get to the point Alisa. Other than Brandi, who DO you like?"
I know that I could be mistaken for the creepy fan that knows everything from:
* where the stalking victim was born,
*to their blood type,
*to when she shuts her blinds.....

Maple Valley >AB negative >7:00. After she has walked her dog.

Oh, knock it off! I'm not serious.

.....

Anyway. So, I like singer/song writer. I like depth in the music. I like it to be REAL music. No keyboards with "weeky weeky, bsht bsht, shicka shicka" fake sounds.

So, here is who I like: (in no particular order, other than the first one. Duh.)

*Brandi Carlile
*The Middle East
*Bon Iver (For those who say Bawn Eye-ver, just some clarification; its Bone I-vear)
*Acorn
*Foster The People (They are the most "weeky weeky, bsht bsht, shicka shicka" I get in my daily music)
*Florence + The Machine
*Ivan and Alyosha
*Mumford & Sons (I was listening to them before it was cool to)
*Ryan Adams

On occasion, I will listen to:
*Phoenix
*LCD Soundsystem
*KT Tunstall
*Civil Twilight
*Spoon

I think that is it. Well, I listen to more. And I like more, but I cant think of who or what.
See?
My musical wardrobe needs to expand and I need to need a walk in closet for it.

Any help? Who wants to help me and be my musical ambassador?
I had a musical ambassador at one point, but I think he quit.
He's been a "no call-no show" for a few months now.

Who do you LOVE to listen to? Over and over and over again.
And then again.

Then once more for the love of it.
Who is it?

Tell me. Right. Now.

~a

oh, and thank you. where are my manners....?

reason

2012-01-26T06:35:00.000-07:00

Im laying here in my bed. In the dark. With Grace in my arms.

I cant think of anything more authentic, pure, natural, comforting, painful.........eternal, than a mothers love.
Than my love for her.

Loving her is what all of me is made of.
She is the reason my lungs expand with air.
She is the reason blood flows through my body.
She is what l feel when I feel. Anything.

She is the reason for everything.

mortar

2012-01-25T20:08:00.001-07:00

Interesting.
Earlier today I thought about the words we say to those we love, when we feel (or even know), we wont get the chance to say them again.
A loved one is leaving. Perhaps to serve our country, their religion, or to serve their heart. We fear that we may not have the option to look in their eyes again. Feel their breath again. Touch them again. The fear is real and justified.
Even so, a loved one on tail end of their journey here on earth.
We think and say all the things we have never said or always said but couldn't possibly say enough.
None of the hurtful things about the relationship matter. And why would they?

So, why are these things so much more important, when we feel this time...is the last?
Or should I say...I.

Again, interesting.
A few hours later I got a text from one of the most important people in my life. I was asked kindly to tell this person the good things about them.
This person was hurting and needed to offset the icky things they were telling them selves.
Everything I told this person was absolutely what I felt about them.
But, I really did assume they knew that I felt these thing for them.
However, I cant think of the last time I told them.

Then, I read THIS post from a blog I follow. (I recommend you do too. Her girls remind me of my nieces)

Her close friends dad passed today. She writes about a few of her memories.
From what I gather, it was unexpected.

All those words I imagine his family wanted to say to him. I am not sure if the opportunity was provided.

But I know this.
Now is the perfect opportunity.
It doesn't need to be the deepest thing you've said. Or felt.
But, maybe if we allow the good stuff to float to the top, and the bothersome be camouflaged in between it all, and say what we see........ well, it wont take away the need to say it when we fear we wont have another chance.

I think.that everytime we say what we feel, it can serve as mortar. Not just glue, but the strong material that bonds the relationship. Everytime it leaves our hearts, travels to our lips and is given to our loved one; its one more layer of mortar.

~a

2012-01-24T19:21:00.000-07:00

if i worked at a restaurant, id be fired.
the time between appetizer and portion of main course is unforgivable. (this is part of the main course...get it?)

so, I'm fat.
if you didn't know that, its true.
im not being all down on myself, this is pertinent to the post.
though, im not as fat as I used to be.

so, as a fat person, I get mostly frustrated with fat fashion.
does the word "fat"make you're uncomfortable? k, ill say plus.
anyway, plus fashion is frustrating.
Soooooooooooo frustrating.

I like to think that I have some sort of idea about fashion and what looks good.
What i DO know, is what DOESN'T look good.

Im sorry if the next few rants offend someone. these are just MY thoughts and they are in no way attached to anyone in particular.

im sure there are people out there that would say "if you don't like plus sized clothes options.....get your body un-plus sized"

derp....and duh.
and, shut your know-it-all, judgmental pie hole..." *mmmmmmm....pie.......* (that prally helped more in the negative effect.....)
im trying not to be convinced that the people who design clothes for us plus goddesses are mean bitches that are a size 2* when they are bloated, and they are trying to teach us a lesson. you know, punish us.

now, I know this isnt true, but, based off the options out there, its as if these words are being said as the clothes are being conceptualized (did I just make up a word?) and/or made.....
"fat.....er plus sized ladies should love disney characters on their denim shirts....right? I mean, doc and sneezy are cute when they are giving a 'thumbs up' on the chest pocket....right?"
or....
"plus women have a lot on their body they want to hide....so, lets use LOTS of floral. you know, the kind that looks like it smells like bengay, denture glue and green onions."
and quite possibly.....
"aren't plus women just glad to find something that fits? lets put a collar on this shapeless tent and call it a polo. even better, lets put buttons down this mumu and call it a henley ".

listen, I know no one is out to get me. am I my ideal body size? no.
if there is blame to be had regarding my body, does it belong go anyone else? no.

however, I will not apologize for just wanting to have cute, affordable and comfortable clothes to wear.
oh..and who in-thee-hell decided that only females with slender calves should get to wear zip up boots?!!!
THIS IS WHAT IM TALKING ABOUT!
can some one tell my why the clothes I see in sizes 9-12 cant be made in sizes 14-32?
yup, more material. i get it.
i will pay you more.

maybe I ask too much. but, i don't think so.

so, who is going to help me start a clothing line for plus sized goddesses?

~a

*i am not saying skinny women are bitches. being skinny, fat, white, black, smart or stupid, doesn't make one a bitch.
but there are many bitches that happen to be skinny, fat, white, black, smart or stupid.

the appetizer

2012-01-16T22:21:00.000-07:00

guys!
i haven't blogged since JULY!
oh. my. mona.
i have done a lot over the last 6 months.
Colorado, Seattle, Nashville and California, losts of concerts, drinks with the band, online schooling, 2 weeks without grace, last minute Xmas for 2 families, tubbing, brandi, brandi, brandi, brandi,brandi,brandi, beach and disneyland!
you bet I have to start with brandi.
guys, i saw brandi 6 times last year!
that right there, makes 2011 the best year ever!
husband sent me and sister in law Sara to vegas to see brandi in may for mothers day.
then, she came with ray lamontagne in july.
then me, sister in law Sara, sister Erin, and friends lindsay, angie, cheryl, nicole and Joni went to aspen to see her in August. Sister Erin *thought* she bought her tickets and had them at will call. however, upon further investigation, it was proven that she had not, in fact, purchased a ticket to the sold out show.
enter my God given gift of gab.
option one....and only.
find a band member, tell them story....hope to buy one of their guest list tickets.
even better? sister erin gets on the bands guest list.
no lie.
then we hauled butt home to slc to see her and I&A the next day.
then husband took me to nashville to see her.....TWICE!
once at the ryman theater, then we saw her debut at the grand ole opry.
i was so proud of her.
it was great to be there when husband got to meet her.
6 times!

k, so, my next few posts will be random time frames.
i may talk about August, then December, then october etc....you get it, right?

there will be funny, lame, feel good, random, and.....I may tell on myself. actually, i will tell on myself.

Bubye dears

~a

Buying Ice for a Stranger

2011-07-13T22:39:00.000-06:00

Giving and Receiving and how receiving is giving and giving is receiving. And now I am dizzy and need a Dramamine.....

I "ran" to the grocery store to get "some" items.

***Saying "ran" may give you the idea that I do this in a quick and efficient manner. HA! There will be no more hunger in the world, no such thing as spiders, calories will be something you cant ever have enough of and the world will most likely implode on the day THAT happens. On that same said day, I will only get "some" items as well. So, according to *this* (me) Nostradamus and the reality of that EVER happening......breathe easy kids. The world isn't ending anytime soon....***

Back to the subject.

Grocery store...

Run in....

Some things....

Riiiight....

I'm at the check out counter. The people in front of me had 2 carts FULL of items. (If they are like me, their intention was only to get garbage bags and brussel sprouts)

I didn't mind being behind them and waiting for a while in line. This is when I actually breathe. This is when I can relax. Grace was playing with friends, Tye was at a meeting and I was in line at the grocery store...breathing.

After the couple in front of me was done, the checker started scanning my stuff.

Now, I didn't have 2 carts full of items. I didn't even have a full cart. But, i had A LOT of fresh veggies and fruit and that can take a bit of time to ring up. There was a line behind me, and the checker was only about half way through my stuff, when the people who were in front of me came back and asked "did you ring me up for the ice?"

The checker hadn't charged them for ice. He said to him "I'm sorry, I didn't. Let me finish with this line first and I can."

Now, honestly, on most days, if a checker had told me that, I would have been a bit put out. I wouldn't say anything "mean", but I may not have been all sorts of cheery.

But, this customer was fine with it and he was willing to wait.

That's when my "me" ping-ed me.

Without thinking, I said to the checker "Just ring me up for it".

The checker looks at me and says "What? you wanna pay for it?"

"Yes" I said.

The customer who needed the ice said "What? No. You don't need to do that."

"I know that I don't NEED to do it. If I felt that I NEEDED to do it, I may not want to. I WANT to do it. Get your ice and go. Get outta here. I looks like you are going somewhere fun." This instruction came from a pure, authentic and authoritative place.

So, then the checker gets all nervous and starts making these moaning sounds. Like "ohhhh....uhhhh....hmmmmm....eeeerrrrr..."

I said " Are you OK?"

He said "Oh man, I don't know if I feel comfortable about having you pay for their Ice....It feels....weird..."

"YOU feel weird about ME paying for THEIR ice....?" I asked.

"Yeah" He said.

"Well", I started "Here is the good news. Its not up to you. :) Now, ring it up so he can take it and go..."

That's when the guy that I was buying the ice for chimed in saying, " Really ma'am, you don't need to do this."

I turned to him and said "Didn't i tell you to get to gettin at what you were gettin to? Listen, I want to buy your ice. It isn't because I don't think y0u can afford it, or because you aren't patient enough to wait in this line again. I just simply want to. So, could you please take your ice with a smile, enjoy what you are going to go do and do something nice for another stranger soon?"

"Yes" he replies. "And Thank you"

I responded with "You are welcome, and thank you".

Now, the checker was still SUPER nervous. He was still ringing up my things and I said to him "why did that make you so nervous?"

This is what he says- "I don't know. People aren't just nice like that. You are just really nice."

As soon as the last word left his mouth, I said- "Not True!"

That startled him.

I said "Everyone is 'nice'. Every single person. YOU are 'nice'. Wanna know how I know? Because you recognized it in me. Everyone can be 'nice'. But, try letting others be 'nice'. THAT is the gift."

He shook his head and just said "ok" and finished ringing me up.

Try it.

For real.

Do something nice for a complete and total stranger.

You'll notice something.

You will notice that there is something familiar in the person you are doing something nice for.

Like...a reflection.

Perhaps a reflection of humanity.

You know when you are in between two mirrors facing each other? And you see your reflection on and on with no end.

Yeah, buying ice for a stranger is like that.

Alisa

Grateful

2011-06-08T20:16:00.000-06:00

I surely dont say it enough.

Though, I do think it.

So, Im puttin it out there-

*The wisdom of a 9 year old

*13 years of marriage

*Making it to 35. (It always seemed soooooooooo old, right?)

*My job

*My creativity

*Really grounded, smart, open minded, Loving friends

*Tattoos

*Hulu and Kitchen Nightmares (For reals guys. I am ADDICTED to Chef Ramsay)

* Water

*Faga Yogurt

* The opportunity to go to the gym when ever I want, even tho I rarely do

* Laundry detergent. Serious, how did clothes get clean before? I mean, I could do it with one of those pioneer silver bumpy things if I had detergent. But, I cant clean my clothes WITH a washer if there's no detergent. Think about it.

*Fresh eggs when ever I want

*Whole Foods

*Tooth brush

*Tinker Bell and Her friends (Ima believer)

*FIREFLYS!!!!

*Sisters

*Brothers

*all of their kids

*A good fitting bra (only a few of you may understand what kind of engineering goes into keeping these puppies off the ground. Or getting stuck in my knees)

* Dreams

*Money in my bank account

*Growing up ( a little bit)

* Grace

* The idea that I may read a book, so at least I get the pleasure of buying it......

* Internet

* Olive Leaf Extract

Toodles

Alisa

2011-03-02T21:07:00.000-07:00

I love it when I listen to me.

I love the perfect little surprises that I get when I do.

The fun little verifications that is an "I toldja so" that I like to hear.

Cuz its from me.

Today I got home from work and was deciding what to make for dinner.

I decided on Elk stroganoff.

As I was cooking it, Grace asked if she could go play.

I told her she could, but she had to be home by 7.

Well, stroganoff doesn't take as long as I thought.

There, I was looking a the clock, and it was 6:40. But dinner was ready.

I didn't want to keep it on the stove. I wanted to just get it eaten.

I thought to myself "I should just call her in and let her know that she can eat, then go finish playing."

Then I thought "no....shes only been able to play for 15 minutes. This can sit on the stove an keep warm...."

Then again, "No, call her in now. Its time to eat now."

So, that is what I did.

I went outside, and she was playing with some friends a few houses down.

I called to her "Grace, come eat..."

She didn't hear.

Then I saw Grandpa walking back from his mailbox, back into his house.

Without thinking I yelled "Grandpa...wait"

He turned around, I ran across the street and asked "Have you eaten yet Grandpa?"

He looked at me with a smile on his face and said "Why no, I was just wondering to myself what I should make."

I smiled back and said,"Well, we would love to have you for dinner. If you would like Elk stroganoff, green beans and garlic bread."

His smile increased as he answered "Alisa, that sounds lovely! Let me put my mail away and I will be right over."

We had such a great dinner.

This is the second time he has been over for dinner. I didn't blog about the other time.

I couldn't put it into words. It left me very emotional.

But, as I mentioned, this time was great.

We ate and talked and Tye and I listened to his stories.

He has a lot of really great stories.

Had I not decided to call Grace in early, I would not have seen Grandpa and invited him for dinner. Sure, I could have knocked on his door, but this was about me listening and following to allow perfect timing to happen.

More than the joy I could see from Grandpa, I could feel it from him.

It was tangible.

It was time for him to go home, but I made sure he was sent home with the left overs.

At least he wont have to think about what to make for lunch tomorrow.

I love Grandpa. He makes me happy.

I love when I listen to myself.

It makes me happy.

Alisa

I can almost taste it.

2011-02-28T18:53:00.000-07:00

Ok. Its time.

I need something. I need to use the good parts of me.

I mean, REALLY use them.

Im supposed to do more.

Im supposed to be a part of many peoples lives. Kids lives. All over the world.

Im supposed to be financially secure. REALLY secure. So secure, that I can assist others security.

Im supposed to be my own boss, but work for others. Serve others.

Im supposed to be able to show my girl the world.

She isn't supposed to learn about the rest of the world out side of itty bitty Syracuse, Utah through the internet.

She's supposed to experience it. She's supposed to experience it with me.

We're supposed to sprinkle fairy dust around the world.

K, so, now I gotta figure out what it is that I'm supposed to do to get us there. To get us everywhere.

I think that it involves writing.

Maybe even writing with her.

Yeah. Its time.

-A

Valuable Currency

2011-02-04T21:05:00.000-07:00

Im feelin it.
Blogging time.
Im sorry that I have been away for so long. :(
I hope I am apologizing to someone. I hope I still a have a reader or two.

So, I have been....not me....lately.
I have been in a funk. A funky funk funk.

I believe that what ever is going on outside of you, is a mirror as to what you are putting out into the world.
So, when I start seeing, feeling and watching things swirl around me in my life that I dont like, I need to stop and think what I am (or am NOT) putting out there as well.

Are you dizzy? Did that even make a lick of sense?

Well, anyway, one thing that I have been "struggling" with is expectation of friendship and what that looks like.
Friendship has always been something that has been a struggle for me.

I hated Jr. High because it was an awkward time for friendships for me.
Jr. High just hurt for the most part.

In high school, I had friends. I had one or two close friends. But I wasnt busy on the weekend. Not even close.

I have a hard time expanding my friend-ness. It is a very vulnerable thing for me.

However, I am lucky. I have chosen really good people to be my friends in my adult years. Even a few from my Jr. high and High School years are still my friends. Even if we never "see" each other.

However, of the times that I have been hurt most in my life, it has not been by boys, siblings or parents. It has been by friends.

Right now, Im learning lessons in friendship. Mostly about how I do them. And how I hurt me with them. And, I am learning that there are many on the outside of "my circle" that are just waiting for my signal. My invitation.
I am learning that the more I let people in, the greater risk there is for hurt, and of coarse, the greater risk there is for reward.
I am also learning that it isnt the end of a friendship when I get hurt.
Ok, I have never thought it was the end of a friendship when I get hurt. BUT I will create space while I find another safe place and lick my wounds.

My best lesson about friendship was on Tuesday this week.

Back story-
Since we moved in to our house (11 years ago this May) we have lived across the street of the cutest elderly couple in the world. Ronald and Louise Walker.
They welcomed us so kindly. They LOVED Grace from the minute they saw her, when she was three days old.
She has grown up knowing them as Grandma and Grandpa. Often we would go to their house, talk with them, take them bread, treats...whatever.
Grandpa would come over and bring us tomatoes, salsa and homemade zucchini bread.
As years went on, Grace would get permission to be able to climb their big tree in the front yard. Tye would fix things on the roof, screw in a few light bulbs so grandma or grandpa wouldnt have to get on a step ladder, or shovel their drive and sidewalk.

Then, grandpa got a riding mower so he didnt have to push his mower to mow his lawn.
Tye made a deal with him. Tye would mow grandpas lawn if Tye could use his mower to mow ours.
They shook on it.
(Tye would have mowed his lawn anyway, but he knew grandpa wouldnt let him without a trade)
Grace and I would go rake the front yard, clean up the fruit that fell on the ground and clean up the branches from the heavy winds the night before.

As time went on, I would get a little more concerned for them. They would travel from Mountain Green, Wyoming to Syracuse, Utah every other week or so. Its about a 2 hour drive. But they would do it in the winterest of winter days.
Grandmas health was getting worse. She had been suffering from MS for quite a few years.
She would spend her time inside. In the years before, she would sometimes venture out to the front porch and sit on the bench while grandpa would weed and Grace would climb the tree.
We didnt know their kids or grandkids. They all lived in Wyoming.
But, they knew us.
They knew of Grace, the "OTHER" grandchild in Syracuse.

On Saturday, Tye and I were heading to the funeral of our friends mother.
We pulled out of the drive and passed grandma and grandpas house. There were a few cars there. Tye mentioned that it made him nervous when a bunch of cars were there. I told him that I would get nervous when I would hear sirens, so I ALWAYS checked out the front to make sure they werent headed to grandmas and grandpas.
We both agreed how sad we would be when either of them passed.

Later that day I was at dinner with Grace and her friend. My phone rang with a number that I didnt recognize. I dont normally answer those calls, but I did this time.
I answered it, and it was the old bishop for the ward in our neighborhood. He introduced himself and then let me know that Grandpa asked him to call me. Grandma had passed away that morning.
I was stunned.
I had no idea that there had been issues to that degree.
She had, in fact, been ill and declining the last month. And rapidly the last 2 weeks.
She was having issues breathing on Friday and was in a bad way. So Grandpa took her to the hospital on Friday evening.
Saturday morning, she left.

I hung up with him, and Grace could tell something was wrong.
I let her know that grandma died.
She did her best to keep the tears back.

Then I called Tye. He was stunned and sad as well.

They decided to do a viewing in Syracuse on Tuesday, and the funeral in Wyoming on Thursday.
We had to support Grandpa. We would go to both.

We went to the church where the viewing was on Tuesday.
It was a typical viewing in a church. We waited in line to see Grandpa. We still had not had an opportunity to see or talk to him since grandma passed.
I watched as people in their 70's and 80's showed up, shook hands and had small talk.
I imagine that this stage in life, this really is a common thing that is just part of their lives. So, it makes sense that with that, it can be a little bit casual.
I noticed that nobody hugged grandpa.
There was alot of hand shaking. There was alot of small talk.
I watched as the person infront of me was bringing their small talk to an end, and waited to catch grandpas eye.

Caught it.

I took one step forward with my arms as wide open as they could go and wrapped them around him as if they could go around a dozen times.
Then he wept.
"Oh Alisa, my neighbor. My favorite neighbor. My kind, sweet neighbor. My FREIND."
We hugged tightly and both wept.
He pulled away and apologized for not calling us. saying "I just didnt know how to call you. I hesitated. I wasnt sure."
I assured him that it was ok.
He looked down at Grace who was glued to my side and smiled and said "Hi lovely Grace. Can I please...." and before he could ask, she had her arms wrapped tightly around him.
Tye then wrapped his arms around him and let him know how much he loves him.
And grandpa wept.

During my time of struggling through my value in friendships and almost feeling victimized by friendship, it showed itself in the purest form. And it was reflecting through my 83 year old neighbor.
I realized that friendship has many faces. It has many depths and you may think you know what YOUR friendship means or doesnt mean to someone.....but never assume it doesnt hold value.

And Megan....thank you for being my friend.
I got to reconnect with my special friend Megan on Wednesday night.
And it wasnt a moment too late.
I got to tell her things that hurt me deeply over the last little bit.
She was unbiased. She was wise and she was supportive.
As I have been struggling over the last few weeks and knowing I needed to bounce stuff off of someone, what kept coming back to me was "Megan, Megan, call Megan. Call Megan. Its Megan. Megan is your girl"
Megan was my girl.
I hope I added value to your night and life just as you did mine. I love you friend!

So, the best thing I can do is to be the friend that I want to have.
And so I am.

Alisa

2011-01-12T23:54:00.000-07:00

3.....2.....1.....
Meltdown

Bad day

2011-01-12T19:23:00.000-07:00

So, its not been a great couple of days.
Well, today was great for a couple of hours. But, before it....meh. After it.....meh.

Yesterday I started a.....detox. Yeah, a detox.
Tye is doing it with me. It's not HCG.
Anyway, I slept funky Monday night. I didn't get to sleep until about 2. Then kitty started crying, whining and meowing REALLY loud at 5:30. In THE MORNING!!!! So, I had a raging headache all day.
First day of detox + funky sleeping - actual sleep + drama that just won't go away and makes me crazy = the crappiest of crappy days in a long time for this girl.
Today, headache lingering because I slept funky. Kitty up at 5:30, gotta get to work, "don't back out B....don't back out B" going through my head. Low numbers. Blah blah blah.

Here's what I need. I need a wise, non-biased person to talk to.
I don't want someone who will give into and agree with my smallness.
I want someone to tell me I'm wrong for feeling this way about *this*, and that I'm not seeing things as their potential.
I want someone to tell me I'm wrong, and I want them to be right.

And, I want my tooth not to hurt until I have insurance.

And I want a cookie.
Hmmphh

New Year, New Day, New Moment

2011-01-01T10:23:00.000-07:00

***K, I wrote this on Saturday, but was having issues....with my fauxhawk, jeep, and I gained 5 lbs overnight. Plus I keep getting little jabs of pain all over my body.

Hmmm....how perplexing.....***

Happy new year!!!!

I resolve everyday. So, I'm not going to do this whole resolution thing just because it's the beginning of a new year.
I do it cuz it's a new day, a new moment, a new opportunity.

Daily:

-I punish myself way too much about food. I won't do that anymore. That doesn't mean that I'm going to just eat like crap and ignore the consequences. No, what I mean is that if I chose to not eat crap, it is because of how it makes my body feel. It will be because I am treating myself kindly. And I will no longer treat myself unkind with words in my head.

-With speaking more kindly to myself, I will with others as well. With my girl and my hubby specifically. I will spend more time with my girl, doing what eight year olds do. With that, I will also have more follow through with my girl. I mean this in the discipline area. She may voice the contrary, but she works well with discipline.

-I'm going to read more books. With this new thing I have that is flat and shinny and has a fruit on the back (I dare not say the name for fear I might get another jabbing pain in some random place on my body), I have downloadable books. There are lots of free ones, and the ones that aren't free, are cheap. More books that really interest me. With that, I will be consciously creating more time to do so.

-I won't resolve to keeping my house cleaner. I think that will be a result of me being truer to myself. Doing what centers me. What grounds me.

-I'm going to say sorry when I'm sorry, and say I'm wrong when I'm wrong.

-I'm going to say yes when the answer is yes, and I'm going to say no when the answer is no.

- I am going to say kinder, thoughtful, conscious words in my marriage. 2010 was a great year for us because hubby stayed conscious. 2011 is my year to do that. Oh man, we're gonna make our friends dry heave. Hehehehe

-I am going to make use of the money I pay to the gym every month. I just dont know when.

Now for the FUN stuff:

- I am going to go to AT LEAST 3 Brandi Carlile concerts. In Utah or out of state. Whatever.

- Im going to get 2 tattoos!!!

- Im going to do the SLC Marathon again. (Bike Tour)

- Im going to do LRRH.

WAHOO!!!

What are you creating in 2011?

Alisa

2010-12-28T11:38:00.000-07:00

Yay! I'm blogging from my brand new iPad! Tye brought it home for me yesterday. I was sur-prised indeed.
I always thought they were cool, but never thought of spending that kind of money on me. Or on something I don't "need".
But, I have to say, it's pretty rad.
I know that I haven't even begun to know all it can do. But it will be fun to figure it out.

Last night I downloaded a bunch of free iBooks. Then I read one to grace as we snuggled, rather than watching tv.
It's good.
Really good.

So, how was your Xmas? Ours was fantastic!
Tye was pleasant, grace was pleasant. I think I was pleasant.
We went to my mom and dads on the 23rd to celebrate Xmas. Everyone had originally planned on going to San diego over Xmas, but us. So we made othee loans for Xmas. Then, not everyone decided to go to San diego, so, my parents came here.
However, we had already made Xmas plans, enter Xmas on the 23rd.

It was great. We ate, talked, played games. We also gave my parents their gift.
We had the grandkids pictures professionally done for them.
The last time we had them done was 8 years and 4 grandkids ago.
It was time.

I had my sister in law, Sara, take the pictures.
Those that are followers, prally already know how awesome she is.
Then ww had them printed on wrapped canvas from iprintcanvas.
He rocks.
Our pictures came out UH-MAZING!!

We were so excited to give the pictures to them.
They LOVED it!!!!

My mom cried. Score!

Then we played trivial pursuit until 2 in the morning.
It was such a great night.

The next night we went to tyes moms for our annual family Xmas party. Every year we have a themed party. This year analee wanted to have us bring our music stuff so we could make music. So we decided that we would all come dressed as musicians. Well, not EVERYONE was a musician.

Tye was some guy from alice in chains. He actually could have been kid rock.
Grace was shania twain and I was Elton John. I will post pics when I can get them from Sara.

Analee was Liza maneli (sp?)
I can't remember who Doug was, but he looked AWESOME!!!
Yale was Ted nuggent, allee was pat benatar (sp?)
Linzy was one of the beetles and Xander was Chris ledeux.
Alex was Elvis, Sara was MJ and Oliver was Michael McClain. Oliver was my favorite. He looked awesome!!!

Anyway, it was a great night with yummy food and awesome music,

Grace got a couple small things for Xmas from Santa. Then......from around the corner the kitty came.
She flipped out!
She has wanted a cat for a long long time. I have always said no.
She eventually got good with it. So she didn't suspect a thing!!!

I'm not gonna lie, this kitty is pretty damn cute!!
We named her Tori.

Then up to tyes dads we went. We spent most of the day there. It was really nice and relaxing.

However, I am glad that it is over.

Now, back to the gym. I gotta get there before the beginning of the year so it isn't just a resolution.
Know what I mean?

Bye bye.

Alisa

15 Hours in Seattle

2010-11-26T10:54:00.000-07:00

So, my trip to Seattle.....

LOTS of driving.

LOTS.

And then more.

Why did I go?

Silly, you know why I went.

I went to go see my girl, Brandi.

I was supposed to see her twice, but only got to once. The story is coming.

Now, as much as I love Brandi and the twins, they are not complete without her drummer, Allison Miller. She is not only the frosting, but the sugar IN the frosting.

Serious.

So after their headliner, they dimmed the the lights. Then Allison snuck up on stage, sat at her drums, and without any notice, went INSANE on the drums. INSANE!!

I think it scared everyone.

And here she is, going CRAZY!!

Oh man, it was SO GREAT!!

THEN, here is the song........

(There are some swears here....)

I WAS SO EXCITED!!!! I have always wanted to see her do Creep Live!

I cant even tell you how AMAZING it was!!!

In this video, she is singing with her sister Tiffany (who is engaged to Phil)

While we were in line, I mentioned to Jen and Cristina (our new friend) that I bet she will bring her sister on stage, since they are playing at home. OH, and MAYBE even her mom.

Guess what, SHE DID BOTH!!

This is Tiffany and Brandi.

I love, love, love, love, love her.

But, you know this.

So, bum deal though. We didn't get to see her perform with the Seattle Symphony. :( Sad.

There was some gnarly weather headed our way, and I DID NOT want to drive in it.

I woke up Sunday morning with 6 different weather alerts on my phone and ALL of them were places we had to drive through.

I just had a pit in my stomach. Leaving was the LAST thing I wanted to do. Well, second to last thing. (The VERY last thing I wanted to do was drive home is gnarly weather.)

So, as I listened to myself say to Jen, "Jen, we cant stay, we need to go."

While the rest of me way saying "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!"

I knew we had to go.

I had been nervous the WHOLE trip about driving home.

I like to believe that I made the smart choice, even though we STILL had to stay the night in Baker City......AGAIN!

Oh Baker City..... I really dont care if I EVER go there again.

INFACT, if I drive to the Northwest again, I will drive straight past Baker City to Pendleton. If I have to break it up, I will stay in Pendleton for the night.

Our first night, we stayed in Baker City. We stayed at Knights Inn.

Oh lala.....

When we got in, I think it was 21 degrees.

We checked in, and sorry, but I could only understand about every 5th word that came from the man behind the desk.

We get up to our wood paneled room and bundled up. IT WAS SO COLD!

It looked like there were about 3 different ways to heat our room. So, I picked up the phone in our room to call the front desk to ask which way I heat our room that was, no lie, 45 degrees.

Im not kidding you when I tell you that the phone in the room, WAS A PROP!

Serious.

There were no hang up buttons.

AND, there was nothing plugged into it.

Yeah. Things were goin' great.

So, I called the number that they had on the pad of paper that they provided.

Apparently, Knights Inn has a call center.

A women answered the phone and I told her what room we were in and we needed to know how to turn on the heat, My Land, THE HEAT!

Mother of all that is warm, I NEED HEAT!

The girl on the other line says, (quite condescendingly, I might add) "Listen, Im not at your hotel, this is a call center."

I say "This dump has a CALL CENTER??"

Her: "........"

Me: "Well, then I bet you have the number to the one that I am staying at. Im in Baker City, Oregon."

She gave me the number. I call it.

Again.... every 5th word is understood.

However, I did understand this part: "If you like, I can come up there and help you figure it out..."

Uh, Thanks, and NO THANKS.

We did what we thought we needed, bundled up, and tried to fall asleep. (Worst night of sleep on a LONG time)

I figured the heat came on around 2 or 3 in the morning.

Nice.

So, as I said....back in Baker City again. I was NOT a happy camper.

Anywho, watch those Youtubes and love her. LOVE HER!

Consistantly Inconsistant

2010-11-16T20:15:00.000-07:00

Holla!

Can I just tell you.... I AM SO AMAZINGLY, TRULY, GENUINELY EXCITED!!!

Really, I don't get REALLY excited about much. Day to day stuff just isn't exciting.

Don't get me wrong, I am comfortable in my daily, boring and predictable routine.

Comfortable- VERY

Love it- Not all the time

I have a great job. It really is a good gig. Minimal stress. Casual setting. Great people to work with. As far as jobs go, I have a sweet gig.

BUT- There are the mornings when I wake up and I say out loud "Please...no....not again. I cant do this routine one more time...I cant!"

Then I think really hard.

And then I remember, ITS SATURDAY!

Now, dont think that just because it is saturday, there is anything exciting going on.

Nope. On any given Saturday you can find me cleaning my house. Just so it can stay clean for 3 days. Then it becomes a mess and I do it all over again on Saturday.

Hows that for routine?

BUT- Not this Saturday. Hip Hip Hooray!

I will be in SEATTLE!!

Serious, this little ole Utah girl has wanted to go to Seattle for-EVAR!

The gloomeyness of it. The GREEN. The grunge. And I am positive that Seattle just always smells like coffee. ALWAYS.

Oh man, i am SO EXCITED!

So in this post, I blogged about why im going to Seattle. Remember how I mentioned that we paid 400+% for our symphony tickets?

Well, shortly after I blogged that, I got this email....

Hi,

I read about your unfortunate experience with the symphony tickets on your blog. I just wanted to let you know, in case you didn't already, there is a secret show with Brandi and the Twins on Saturday 11/20 at Neumos in Seattle. Tickets are still available. The show is listed as "The Story Guy and his Band".

https://www.etix.com/ticket/servlet/onlineSale?action=selectPerformance&cobrand=neumos&performance_id=1342018

Hope you can make it.

Roberta

(www.againtoday.com)

WHA????

How did this chic know to read my blog? Don't get me wrong.....SO GLAD SHE DID!

Againtoday.com is a fan website for Brandi Carlile.

So, yeah....I've been on it a few times.....what of it?

Anyway, the next day I went online to the venue website.

Sure enough "The Story" guy and his band.....

But, there was no bio for them. I get it, is supposed to be a secret show.

But I wanted to make sure!

So I called the venue.

Ring Ring Ring

Them: Neumos

Me: Hi. I have a quick question.

Them: Sure. What is it?

Me: So, Im looking at your website and the shows coming up.

Them: yeah

Me: Well, Im reading the bio's, but there isnt one for "The Story Guy"and his band....

Them: ................

Me: Hello?

Them: Why are you asking?

Me: Well, as I mentioned just now, you have bios for all the other bands, but not this one. What can you tell me about them?

Them: Well, actually, its a secret show.

Me: Secret show? How is it secret if its on your website? ( I knew why it was secret.....I just like to ask alot of questions)

Them: Well, its a band that is pretty popular in Seattle, so they are doing a show only for those loyal, hardcore fans that would know how to find out that they are doing a secret show.

Me: So, you're talking about Brandi Carlile.....Right?

Them:...................

Me: Hello?!

Them: I cant tell you that.

Me: Well, OBVIOUSLY Im one of those fans you speak of since I just asked the secret question about the secret band.....

Them: Per the contract, I cant say the name of the band. BUT, I can tell you this. Get your tickets.

IM SO EXCITED!!!

AND Brandi was on Austin City Limits on Saturday night.

It was like watching someone I know on TV.

I know, I am pathetic.

I am pretty much a stalker.

Wait, no, im not.

I don't know anything that anyone else couldn't know.

Its not like I know the color of her drapes. Or her route to the gym......past the grocery store and next to the library in the small town she lives in.

Sheesh...its not like I know that she likes to eat brown sugar on her cream o wheat with one boiled egg while she reads the paper (local section first)

THAT would be icky.

Funny Grace story (havent done one for a while)

We went to the dentist today.

I knew that she had at least one cavity. So, I wanted to make sure I used my insurance before things changed the beginning of the year. AND, I wanted to make sure we didn't have to deal with any bigger problems later.

I know, good mom, right?

So, she HATES the dentist. She gets scared. But, we have a great one for her. She gets to watch a movie on the 3-D glasses magigado thingy.

AND, she gets laughing gas.

SHE IS HILARIOUS!

All inhibitions out the window. At one point the dentist was giving her a numbing shot. It was pinchy and it hurt.

Grace was saying "Ow! Owie! Stop. Please Stop!"

The dentist said "Im almost done.....5 more seconds...."

Grace YELLS (with the dentists hand in her mouth, but heard VERY clearly) "DONT LIE TO ME LADY! TAKE YOUR EVIL MACHINE OUTTA MY MOUTH!!"

hahahahahahahaha

The dentist looked at me, I just shrugged my shoulders. Thats my girl.

Then, as the dentist was working on her, and she was watching Tom and Jerry, at one point she started laughing and could not stop. The dentist stopped for a second and asked "Whats so funny Grace?"

Grace responds with sticking her pinky finger in the air and giggles "Look how skinny and little my pinky finger is....I wonder how bendy it is...."

Yeah, she was feelin' good.....

2010-10-29T23:10:00.000-06:00

so, if you know me, or if you read my blog (at the right time) you know that i have the hugest girl crush on Brandi Carlile.
HUGE-EST!!

last time she was in town, she came for THREE nights in a row!
THREE!!
the first two were impromptu.
i went to 2 of the 3.

she is so amazing.

anyway, i met lots of super cool people in those two days as i sat in line waiting for the doors to open. one person had told me about brandi's performance in seattle with the seattle symphony.
she said that if you are a brandi fan, this performance is not to be missed.

i have never been to seattle, but i already know that i love it. serious.
already love it.
so, a couple weeks ago, being the brandi ho that i am, i decided i was going to see her in seattle.
i may go alone, i may invite someone. who knows.
either way, im going to go see her.

now the money.

i was determined. this would happen and the funds would make them selves known. (does your money hide from you as often as mine does?)

i was given what i needed.
we were refinancing our house at the time, and as luck would have it, between the payment we skip with the refi, the taxes we paid for 2010 that we get back and the money that we got back at closing (which we werent planning on)- there is more than enough to go on my trip.

su-weet!

so, then i decide that i will invite a friend.
it took a few days, but she was in.

perfect!

then, on tuesday night, my friend asked if we should get our tickets.
i didnt think so. brandi is doing two nights. the first sold out, but i didnt think the second one would.
i went online on wednesday to get tickets.................SOLD THE EFF OUT!!!

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ok, well, not totally sold out.
there was still ONE ticket left at $71.00
ONE!

i called my friend in a panic.
then we decided there has to be ones for sale.
ebay, craigslist, other ticket vendors (aka...scalpers)

so, we found 2 tickets for $87 each. we knew that we were paying more than face value. prally 200% more. but we were fine with that.
my friend ordered them. they were to be delivered to her house.

she text me today to let me know that they tickets showed up.....and they have their face value printed on them.

come to find out that we would have saved some money IF paid a 200% increase.
we would have saved money if it was a 300% increase.
and....we would have even saved money if it was a 400% increase.....
we paid a 450% increase on the face value of our tickets.
they were $19.00 tickets!!!
yup, i said $19.00!!!

i decided its all good. i would be WAY more disappointed if i didnt get to go.

road trip from salt lake to seattle and back in 3 1/2 days.
and i get to hear brandi sing.

i. am. so. excited.

lets hope we do better with the hotel rates. :}

alisa

Candi....what?

2010-10-20T11:16:00.000-06:00

**Warning, this is a LONG post. If you want to know about what MAY be ailing you...continue.**

Candida-

Ever heard of it? You probably have. However, I have not. Well, until yesterday.

I was talking to my mom about Nutri-biotic for this little sickness I have been dealing with for the last couple of days. (Made me miss going to San Diego....jerk)

Anyway, my mom was rambling off the ailments that Nutri-biotic helps with. Then she mentioned yeast infection or candida. She then says "Oh, I need to tell your sister about that part.."

She has had digestion issues as well as other issues that she has been trying to figure out.

At one point she thought that Candida might be the culprit. She was swayed from it. But she came back to thinking that this was the issue. So she did alot of research and she is pretty sure she has found what ailes her.

For those of you who, like me, havent heard or known of candida let me tell you what it is.

Candida is the over growth of yeast in your body.

All of us have yeast in our body. Naturally the body knows what to do with it and there isnt an issue. However, there are a lot of those who have yeast over growth, dont know it, and then have issues that they arent sure what to rack it up to.

This is about yeast over growth in the digestive system. It makes it hard for your body to process your food. And, if you dont know that you are dealing with it, you are probably making it worse with the foods you consume.

My sister decided she would do the candida spit test.

Great name huh? Well, its pretty self explainitory.

In the morning, you put some distilled water at room temperature in a clear glass. Then, before you put ANYTHING in your mouth, you get a good amount of spit in your mouth and you spit in the glass. You can leave there for up to an hour to see what your spit does.

IF it gets stringy and kind of separates as it goes towards the bottom, YOU my friend are dealing with candida. IF it separates like small spotty pieces, YOU my friend, are dealing with Candida. If it floats on top of the water, YOU my friend, are NOT dealing with Candida.

Ok, so, what are the symptoms of Candida?

Well, there are many. Hell, breathing could be a symptom. Yep, its one of THOSE things where anything that you feel could be related. But, just for fun, I will list the symptoms.

Here goes.....

abdominal gas and bloating

headaches

migraines

excessive fatigue

cravings for alcohol

anxiety

vaginitis ( cant we thing of a better name...??)

rectal itching

cravings for sweets

inability to think clearly or concentrate

hyperactivity

mood swings

diarrhea

constipation

hyperactivity

itching

acne

eczema

depression

sinus inflammation

pre-menstrual syndrome

dizziness

poor memory

persistent cough

earaches

low sex drive

muscle weakness

irritability

learning difficulties

sensitivity to fragrances and/or other chemicals

cognitive impairment

thrush

athlete's foot

sore throat

indigestion

acid reflux

chronic pain

Some may look at this and say "k, so....whats the big deal?" Well, maybe not a BIG deal if it is mild and you dont have a reason to even think that anything may be wrong. However, it can reck havoc on the following:

digestive

nervous

cardiovascular

respiratory

reproductive

urinary

endocrine

lymphatic

musculoskeletal

So yeah, yeast issues arent just for *down there*. See what I mean? ANYTHING and EVERYTHING is a symptom. However, for my sister, her issues that lead her to this conclusion was bloating, sugar craving (abnormal amounts), anxiety, as well as hormonal issues.

When she was talking about all of this, I thought "Hmmmmm.....I wonder if there is something to this for me.."

My issues, Keeping the weight off, sinus issues, headaches, gas and bloating and digestion issues. Ya know, my stomach never feels good.

So, I did the spit test. Sure enough, it didn't take long for my spit to separate, get stringy and sink.

So, what can be done about this?

Well, there are some supplements out there that say they can combat the candida with out much change in diet.

There may be some truth to that. However, I tend to believe that the majority has to be done with diet.

So, what does the Candida diet consist of? I asked this to my sister and PRAYED and crossed my fingers that it wasnt like eating when on HCG.

Well, it kind of is. But not the same.

The "DONT EVEN THINK ABOUT EATING!!" Foods-

SUGAR!! Avoid it like the plague. Did you even know how many kinds of sugars there are? Well take a looky loo:

-Beet Sugar
-Maple Sugar
-Date Sugar
-Organic Cane Syrup
-Organic Cane Juice
-Organic Cane Sugar
-Dextrose
-Maltose
-Lactose
-Maltodextrin
-Fructose
-High Fructose Corn Syrup
-Brown Sugar
-Powdered Sugar
-Honey
-Molasses
-Alcohol is the most refined form of sugar you can consume.

Anything ending in "lose"....yeah, stay away from that.

-No alcohol
-No wheat
-No yeast
-No caffeine (Caffeine prompts the liver to dump large doses of sugar into the blood stream)
-No preservatives and additives
-No refined and processed foods
-No moldy foods
-No dairy (except yogurt and butter on occasion)
Cheese and milk contain lactose (milk sugar) which the yeast will feed on.
(some people can do small amounts of cottage cheese)
-Low in Carbohydrates

-No processed meats like lunch meat, spam, bacon, sausage etc.

Um...ok, so what CAN I eat?

-Lean Meat and Fish
-Eggs
-High in Protein and Vegetables
-Low in Fruit and Nuts

The basic and most successful anti Candida diet should consist of nothing but lean meat, eggs, and low carbohydrate vegetables. A small amount of whole fruit, nuts and seeds may be acceptable if they don't flare symptoms.

Meats to Include

-buffalo (is lower in fat and cholesterol than chicken or turkey)
-chicken
-beef
-turkey
-lamb
-ostrich
-pheasant
-venison
-fish.( its good to be wise about the fish you eat. some are high in mercury and *most* farmed fish are full of pollutants. I also read that Atlantic Salmon is higher in mercury than pacific salmon)

I always think that Organic is best. I mean, if you are trying to get rid of the yeast overload in your body, it makes no sense to eat meat that is pumped full of antibiotics. (one of the things yeast feeds on)

Low Carb Vegetables to Include

-cabbage
-kale
-lettuce
-cucumbers
-zucchinis
-cauliflower
-green beans
-spinach
-any green leafy vegetable is low in carbohydrates
-onions
-garlic
-green peppers
-avocados (are excellent because they are also very good for stabilizing -blood sugar)
-tomatoes are low carb but high in acid and often aggravate yeast, you'll need to monitor your symptoms to determine whether you should include them in your diet.

Ok....so what can I eat, but just not much of or not often?

High Carb Foods to Avoid or Eat Sparingly

-potatoes (DAMN!)
-carrots (Meh..)
-sweet potatoes (DAMN!!)
-yams (DAMN DAMN DAMN!)
-corn (meh...)
-beans (damn-ish)
-winter squash (SH&T, DAMN, HELL!!!)

K...FINE! WHAT ELSE CANT I HAVE???

Grains

Grains should be avoided completely or reserved for special occasions on the Candida diet. Not only are they are highly allergenic and high in carbohydrates, but the human body does not digest them properly. They disrupt the gastrointestinal tract.

-rice (meh...)
-wheat (Meh...)
-oats (meh...)
-barley (meh..)
-spelt (meh...)
-rye (meh...)
-corn (meh....)

There are ALTERNATE grains that can be used though:

-Kamut (huh?)
-Quinoa (YUMMY!!)
-Amaranth (Ama...what?)

So.....I guess this isnt really much different than how normally eat....except for the the stuff that I am swearing about. BUT...Eggs and Yogurt are allowed...to an extent.

Yogurt is okay on occasion because it contains healthy bacteria. (GREEK YOGURT!!)
-Cheese or cottage cheese should be restricted for special occasions. (meh..)
-Eggs are a good protein and contain no carbs. (YAY for Fresh Eggs from our chickens!!)

Lets talk about nuts-

Some people can include nuts, while other's can't. Nuts are very good for you, so if you can include them in your diet, you should. However in the beginning phase of the Candida diet they are best avoided or reduced.

Nuts are moldy. Some of them are also high carbohydrate.

Cashews are high in carbohydrates.

Macadamia, Almond, Walnut Hazelnut are lower in carbohydrates. Peanuts should be avoided, they are actually a legume, not a nut.

Ok, so whatev....I mean, I would be sad if I couldn't eat Almonds, but they are Ok-ish. Sweet!

This ones going to hurt. Alot......Fruits..... grrrr....ok, here is goes-

Most people need to cut down on fruit intake drastically while following the Candida diet. This is because fruit is high in natural sugar. Some fruits are higher in sugar than others.

Some people can eat fruit freely and other people can't eat it at all. On the other hand, some people can only eat fruit that is lower in sugar.

Fruit High in Sugar
-Oranges (very moldy as well)
-Bananas
-Dates
-Raisins (At one point these wrinkly fellas were Grapes.......damn! I LOVE LOVE LOVE Grapes. But, I did stop eating them as much because I noticed that I was bloated the more I ate them. And I could eat a pound a day. No lie... So this is making sense)

Fruit Medium level of sugar
-Apples
-Apricots
-Peaches
-Melons (also very moldy)

Fruit Low in sugar
-Strawberries
-Blueberries
-Raspberries
-Blackberries
-Pears

Oh, and this. NO VINEGAR!!!! WHAT???? I guess scientifically, it makes sense. I think I can handle it. However, Apple Cider Vinegar is fine. But I LOVE Balsamic Vinegar. Hmph.

So, in a nut shell (depending on the nut)

No Starches

that is to include grains and root veggies.

So, no bread.

No pasta

Minimal (if ANY) fruit

No dairy (sucks that I LOVE blue cheese....ya know....moldy cheese....perfect feeding ground for a yeast extravaganza)

Very picky with nuts and what is actually a nut.

"They" say that for every month you have had candida, you should adopt the diet. But who knows how long they have had candida. I mean, by the time the symptoms make you go "hmmmm" its already a problem. So, I will do it as long I feel I need to. Then when I am ready, I will introduce some of the no-nos into my diet and pay close attention to the results.

LOTS of people D.R.O.P. weight like a hot plate when they get going on this. Not knowing that this was a main reason as to why it has been so frustrating getting the weight off.

So- here goes nuthin. I would like to say that I will blog about results in the way I feel and look and that I will also blog about what I eat, but really....who am I kidding?

If I do, consider it a good day for me....and you. :)

Alisa- The Candida Hunter

2010-09-17T20:42:00.000-06:00

i really should be getting ready to go to the gym.

i guess all it takes is putting my shoes and sock on. i think i can do that and be there 18 minutes.

push play on the ipod to the right. its gonna play my new favorite song for right now.

k, so, i know how much i talk about brandi carlile. but serious guys, she is UH-MAZING!

so, she came to Red Butte in july. then 3 weeks later announced that she would be at The State Room in September. the minute they went on sale, i got my ticket. i am glad. she sold out in a hour. now, there were only 300 tickets available, but still.

so, she was scheduled to come on tuesday the 14th. and she did.

but she came on the MONDAY and SUNDAY before!!!!

she was supposed to open for sheryl crow in vegas and reno, but SC got the poopies.

so, she canceled.

so brandi was like- " hey, lets go see our besties in the SLC."

i couldnt go to sunday, but I went to monday with nikki and joni. then AGAIN on tuesday with joni, nikki, nancy, nicole, jen and lindsay.

i knew that i was going to have to be all crazy and get in line at like 2. doors opened at 7. So that is what i did. and sure enough, there were like 9 chairs in front of me.

but that was cool. i knew that we would still get front left of the stage. yup, bellies to the stage.

that is my new favorite thing. going stupid early to concerts and waiting in line. i made lots of new friends. and i am sure that there were people that wanted to punch me in throat too. but whatev, i made friends with some pretty groovy people. however, they thought i was a lesbian. in all fairness, most people that see brandi ARE lesbians. cuz she is a freakin HOT lesbian herself. and she is an uhmazing singer/songwriter. oh, then, when we were starting to actually go in to the venue, like 7 little glammed out chics decide that they are going to butt in front of us. I wasnt having it. i was mouthy that night. i was pissed. so i took jonis hand and we made our way in front of them. i had one person (that wasnt with the glamm's) ask me if i was trying to butt in front of her. I said "no, im just taking my place back. you were 15 people behind me 20 minutes ago..." nothing she could say about that. she understood. but then i got some stink eyes and wispering from the glamms. so out loud, and a little passive aggresivley, i say to joni ***get ready for some real language*** "i want them to say something to me. i can break their skinny asses over my knee."

i thought that was original. and it shut them up. :)

i had one of my new friends ask me how i met a mutual friend of ours. i tried to explain, and her girlfriend said "wait, arent you her partner?" i said "na, my husband might feel weird about that....at first. but mostly he would get pissed cuz i wouldnt want to take pictures...and then there is my daughter....it might confuse her...."

she went bright red. she apologized.

i dont see a reason to apologize. i told her not to worry about it. would she apologize if she thought i was with another man? nope. please dont think that i would be embarassed if someone thought i was a lesbian. that would indicate that is something to be ashamed of. not in my world. besides, i have many people in my life that are gay, and i love them the mostest.

anywhoooo

brandi said happy birthday to joni cuz we screamed it to her.

she winked at nikki, AGAIN.

she winked at her on monday too when she asked for requests and nikki requested a new song that isnt on any albums yet. so she said ok, and winked at nikki.

oh.

be still my heart.

so after the concert on tuesday, they werent going to come sign autographs. but we knew that they go to the bayou after their shows. so we went there to get something to eat.

they werent there.

but when we were going back to the state room parking lot, we saw that the bus was still there...and there she was. there was brandi.

(they couldnt have left if they wanted to though. nikki was parked in front of the bus...bwahahahahaha)

so i had nothing for them to sign.

damn!

wait, i have my big wheel shirt on.

you know, white shirt with a blue neck and blue 3/4 sleeves.

they can sign my shirt!!

first i had allison (her drummer) sign my shirt. on my chest. (not boobs)

then i had josh, the cellist sign my back, then katie herzig (opening act) and her bass payer sign my back. then brandi signed the right side of my chest.

seriously, one of the BEST nights of my life.....as far as concerts go.

please check her out.

Internet Squatting....

2010-08-23T21:40:00.000-06:00

What you dont know (until now when I tell you) is that I am doing a dance.

A jig of sorts.

This is because WE HAVE INTERNET!!!

Geez Lu-eez, we havent had internet for MONTHS!

Judge if you want, but whatever internet we had, we stole. Well, graciously borrowed.

Someone around here had an open network. So when it worked we graciously said please and thank you. However, I think they stopped paying their bill.

HELLO! You have other internet addictions to feed...not just your own.

But, this is how we are paying "them" back....ours isnt locked. So, they can partake for a few months. I would gladly go tell them, but I have NO IDEA whose internet home we were squatting in. Time to make the universe balanced by sharing...right?

I hope that you dont think bad thoughts about us now.

We really are pretty good people.

Anyway, that is why I am doing a dance. And in order for me to keep up on whats going on in blogger-ville-ing-ton, I would have to lay in bed at night and read the posts. I would also have to post from my phone. It isnt hard, it just takes a long time and I already know that I need to work on my patience.

So, I very graphically threatened my sister in law Sara about getting me the rest of the pictures and video from Oregon. She ignored me.

I cant put on here how I threatened her. But trust me, I am surprised she didnt take out a restraining order on me.

Later she told me she would get them to me soon. So, when I get them, plan on either a mother of a post, or a gaggle of posts. With pictures.

Today is my first day of 500 calories on my third round of HCG. I think my head is in it this time. I am excited that in 40 days, I can undo all that I did in 6 months in the undoing of my 2nd round.

Did that just make you dizzy?

What that means is that in 6 months, I gained every pound back that I lost in my 2nd round. I know some will read this and think or say “See! HCG doesn’t work!!”

I beg to differ.

I didn’t work.

HCG did its job in the time frame that I did it. Hell, it did its job months after I stopped. I’m the dumb @$$ that decided to eat like crap!

Actually, I kept all of it off quite successfully up through May. May was the slippery slope. Well, Oregon was the slippery slope. I came back from Oregon, physically, feeling like crap. I ate badly for how I normally eat. I normally eat fresh, clean foods. In fact, I was talking to my sister last night, telling her that I don’t know why I even have a pantry. Well, at least a pantry that is stuffed to the gills with food that we don’t eat. We just don’t eat out of cans or boxes.

Anyway. I blame me for my weight gain. Blaming HCG for my weight gain is like blaming the Insulin when a diabetic has issues because they decided to eat sugar.

I know exactly where I went wrong. I stopped taking my lunch to work. AND, I stopped going to the gym. I guess in a sense, I got lazy. But man, I feel like I was ALWAYS running. Always having something that needs to get done. I am still super busy. But the part about HCG that I am looking forward to the most (other than the weight loss) is the structure.

In order for me to be successful with it, I MUST be structured. I have to be prepared and I have to be on a schedule. So, that will get me and my lard-o butt back on track.

Ok, so since I have working internet that I can be a proud owner of, I will post more often. I told my friend Jen that I will blog about the time that I got hit by a cyclist……in my PARKED car….. Let that simmer.

In the mean time, I have some Asparagus Curry Chicken soup waiting for me.

Catch ya on the flip flop

Alisa

Help a girl out suga......

2010-08-05T16:11:00.000-06:00

So-
I am planning my return to Italy next year. I will be there in June for two weeks.
We will be in villages that are snuggled up against The Dolomites.

Here is a visual:

Super rough, huh? I know. But I am a trooper.

Anyway, every time I plan an adventure, I think "Oh, but we will so close to _________. Maybe we should try to fit in ___________." And it can turn crazy REALLY fast.
However, last time, we thought "Oh Man, we will be so close to Greece. We HAVE to go to Greece." So we did and it was great. You should check it out here. (But wait until you are done with this one. I need your help!)

This time is no exception.

So, this is the decision we are up against. Below are the three options of the other places we will be so close to.......

Austria

Or

Switzerland

OR...

Southern France

I'm really leaning towards Austria.

Help me out.

List of the Grateful-ness

2010-08-03T13:46:00.000-06:00

Grateful-

*Hand blenders

*Almond milk

*Pink plastic party cups

*Flip flops

*Lagoon passes (because EVERY time we go, we have more fun than the time before)

*Old Navy

*My smart phone

*Zero Calorie Sobe Life water

*This American Life

*Scissors

*Pink toe nail polish with sparkles

*Alicia Unruh

*Pear and gorgonzola pizza at CPK

*Joran, my hair girl

*Candles

*Coconut flour

*Farmers markets

*Tye…..T-horse….Gus. He is pretty dang great. He loves me a lot. And he tells me a lot. J

*Massage Envy and the 5 hours of massage I have saved up

*The picture of a flower Tye painted for me that I have on my desk

*The snow flakes and pictures Grace made for me that I have on my wall in my office

*The Olive Bar at Smiths Market Place in Bountiful

(Im not gonna lie, its borderline inappropriate, this relationship I have with it)

* Cousin Emily

*MUSIC!!

***Brandi. When she sings anything really. But Super thankful for “Again Today” and the line “Im broken down, not good enough-my broken promises add up; they’re twice their weight in tears, which I have caused…”

***Katie Herzig and when she sings “I wanna wish you well” and the line in that song goes “I wanna smell your scent. I wanna breathe the air I did before, before you left….”

*** Ryan Adams- His version of Wonderwall is so….melty

* Park City and the huge lift that takes you to the top of the slide and the $50.00 it cost to do the slide and the coaster for me a Grace.

* Sara Boulter

*Spare Tires

*Knowing how to eat healthy

*Actually eating healthy

*Finishing my day snuggling Grace in my bed while watching The Simpsons and “Getting her zits”.

(Pinching her back)

Secret.....

2010-08-03T13:42:00.002-06:00

I have a secret to tell.
Actually….not a secret. Calling it a secret makes me feel like it is something that I should be ashamed of. And I’m not.

No way.

In fact, I have told other people this. So, it isn’t a secret. It never was.
So, that secret part…..scratch that.

I am 34 with a husband and an 8 year old daughter and I full on peed my pants.
No lie. 100% flood gates opened, peed until there was not more pee to release, peed my pants.

Want the story?

Here it is.

My family and I went up to Island Park, ID for the 4th of July weekend.
Tye’s family has a cabin up there on the lake and when we get invited, we really like to go. Plus, we had just purchased our camping trailer and wanted to break it in.

On Saturday, the rest of the family and Grace went out on the boat. So, Tye and I decided to shoot our bows. We loaded them in the truck with the target and headed out to find a meadow. We found a perfect spot just off a small dirt road.

Here’s where it all started to go….er get wet….

I think that as soon as my feet touched the ground, it triggered the beginning of some sort of bladder betrayal sensory connector in my body. For real, my feet touched the ground from getting out of the truck and I just went “Holy Cow, I have to pee….NOW”

****This is where some might say “If you aren’t interested in the details that I will be divulging below, skip to the next paragraph”. Well, not me. This is where I will say….If you aren’t interested in the details that I will be divulging below, you may want to stop reading my blog all together….*****

Play by play of Operation Bladder Betrayal-

Get out of the truck
HOLY MOTHER OF ALL THAT CONNECTS TO BODILY FUNCTIONS!!
MUST. PEE. NOW.!
Run over to the other side of the truck, in front of Tye’s open door.
Pants down.
Get in “position”.
Pee….
Tye yells “OH SHOOT!.....”.

Ok, at this point, for 1/8th of a millisecond, I thought that there was a rattlesnake by my butt. Don’t worry, there wasnt.

“What??” I say
Tye- “Here come people towards us…”
Sure enough, I didn’t plan on people coming TOWARDS us.
So, Tye jumps in front of me. Seriously though, they have already seen me in peeing position and peeing.
He yells “Hurry, STOP PEEING…GET UP!!”

HUH?!?!

Ok, tell me, who the hell can stop peeing after they have started? And not just a “tinkle” started, but “the flood gates have opened, release the contents” kind of started. Well, apparently, not me. I cant stop. Its as if my bladder has a mind of its own and it has been waiting for the perfect time to betray me. Or, as if it is not even a part of me at all. Totally independent of me and my body. No. It was more like I wanted someone across the world, in another country....say Laos, to stop peeing. I had no say in it.
Makes no sense, right?

So, there I am, pants up, pee still coming out of me. I gave up. I just accepted that pee was coming out of me at a very high rate and no matter what I (or Tye) thought I should be able to do about it, there was nothing that I could actually do about it. So I embraced it. I wouldn’t say that I actually preferred it. However, once I surrendered, it didn’t suck.

By this time, the riders on the ATVs have seen the show and they were on their way to tell all their family and friends and most likely Facebook about. Im sure someone has it on their blog as well. Well, mystery ATV-ers, you are welcome for the content.

So, Tye turns to me and says “You really peed your pants?” …….I look at him with a look that is somewhere between *Did I suddenly start talking in tongues and you didn’t understand me??* and *If that wasn’t you standing next to me while I peed my pants…WHO WAS IT??”

“YES!” I answer as I slap the back of my wet leg to demonstrate how wet my pants were.
“I look like a just sat in a river…..” I tell him. He looks at me, opens his door and gets something. He hands this “something” to me. It’s a (as in ONE) folded napkin………….

I look at him and say “I don’t need to blow my nose….”
He says “Put it in your underwear, it’ll soak up the pee.”
Really, he thought this was a good idea.

I look at him and say: “Tye, I love you. I really do. You know this. We have been married for 12 years. And maybe you have ever doubted my love for you. Hell, I have ever doubted my love for you. But not on this day. No. On this day I am clear about my love for you. However, right now I am doubting your ability to understand that I JUST PEED MY PANTS!!! I DIDN’T DO AN ACCIDENTAL TINCKLE LIKE I DO WHEN I SNEEZE!!! (Don’t act like you don’t know what I am talking about ladies) Thanks, but this will just melt in my pants and become part of the
wet- mess.”

Most of you, well actually, most PEOPLE, would head back to the cabin at this point.
But really, what would be the point? I would have to figure out how to sit in the truck as to not get the seat wet with my peed-ness. I guess I could have sat in the bed of the truck. Just like our dogs….that pee whenever and where ever they want.

But, I REALLY wanted to shoot my bow. So, I made the decision. No, we will not leave. We will stay and shoot our bows. There was a nice breeze out. I was wearing thin yoga pants. They would dry. They were black, so you couldn’t even tell that I had peed….kinda. So that is what we did. We stayed for about an hour and a half, my pants dried, I shot like crap-ish, lost an arrow and made a memory.

Adult incontinence mishap- 2.

With many more to come…I am positive.

2010-07-20T15:39:00.000-06:00

Back in the day... say 1990's, there was an "Apology Line".
It was set up by a very compassionate man named Allan Bridge. Forgiveness was a very important concept and way of life for this man.
He knew that EVERYONE felt sorrow. Even the hardest of criminals that seemed to have no respect for life. Particularly their own.
Mostly, he knew the value in expressing sorrow.

It isn't easy to express sorrow to those that you have hurt.
So, this phone line was set up so those that felt the sorrow, but could not express it to the ones they hurt, could express their sorrow and apologize. All calls, though anonymous, were recorded.
Some might think that is a cowards way out.
Maybe.
But, I think that it was something that he saw as a necessity and was of value. And he moved on it.

I listened to a piece done through NPR called This American Life.
Perhaps you have heard of it.
The program was about Apologies.
It is powerful.

There were 3 different stories in this program. And Allan's was one of them.

One man was sorry for his terrorist acts, riots, fires and bombs that he was responsible for.

Another man was sorry for the abuse he put his elderly and bed-ridden mother through. She was on social security and could not take care of herself. He too, though not elderly and bed-ridden, could not take care of himself. However, this was due to the poor choices he had made in his life.
He needed money.
She needed food and water.
So the bartering began.
She is thirsty and needs a glass of water. Sure. No problem. $5.00
She is hungry and needs a sandwich. Sure. No problem. $10.00
Of coarse, after time, she passes.
And he is left here. Some years later, the sorrow is right where he left it. However, she is not here to apologize to.
The Apology line seems to be his only outlet.

Another man calls.
He is apologizing to his parents and his infant sister.
You see, he killed her.
He was only a child. But he killed her.
He wrapped a plastic bag around her head. She gasped for air. She then turned blue. Then she was still. He was only curious as to what might happen.
With a blue, lifeless child in front of him, he hid the bag and said nothing.
His parents found his sister, dead in her crib.
Autopsy: SIDS

He has NEVER told ANYONE (other than his therapist) what he has carried around his entire life. He, so badly, has wanted to apologize. But how do you do this, years later? How do you tell your parents that their baby didn't "just die"?
How do you tell them that it was because of your doing? Plain and Simple. No other reasons.
Well, he didnt. However, because of this phone line, he was able to voice his sorrow and give it some air. Still, wishing so badly that somehow, his parents were on the other end of the line listening to his confession. His Sorrow. His apology.
But, they werent.

EVERYONE carries sorrow.
What an amazing person Allan Bridge was to recognize this enough and to honor where it lived in him enough, to set up a means for others to express their sorrow. To apologize.

As it seems in most stories like these, there is some irony.

Allan Bridge was active in boating and SCUBA diving. In August of 1995, he was struck by a Jet Skier as he surfaced from diving, and was killed.
The Jet Skier circled around his body once, and then took off.
No one knows who accidentally killed Allan Bridge, the man who believed so deeply in not only apologizing, but forgiveness.

After his death, the Apology Line was shut down. Unfortunately, before the anonymous jet skier, that took Allen Bridges life could make an anonymous call to apologize.

On Saturday night, we received word that my husbands cousin was involved in a very serious auto/pedestrian accident. She was the pedestrian. She was hit by a car, who did not see her, at a rate of 45 miles per hour. She very easily could have been killed. Or worse, sent to a vegetable state.
However, she will be fine. She has some serious injuries and has been in ICU since Saturday, but she will recover.
On Sunday, the driver of the car, his wife and their baby came to see her at the hospital. They apologized. How healing this must have been for Allerie. But probably more so for the driver andhis family.

Embrace your sorrow. Voice it. Dont keep it to yourself.

Apologize.

Alisa

Measuring Time. One Year.

2010-06-09T07:32:00.000-06:00

How do you measure time?

Sure, we have calendars and we have clocks.

But how can you REALLY measure time?

For instance, how does one REALLY measure the time span of one year?

At birthdays, or holidays in the past, I would reflect and think “WOW, one year has gone by fast…..and I can hardly think of what has happened in between.”

But this last year, it was measured very differently.

Its one thing to measure time by dates, events and deadlines - but to measure time in such a way that it is compared to how long someone has been gone from your life…..very different.

Today is the day that marks 1 full year with out my brother Brian. He is my brother. He always will be.

It truly is amazing to me how I quantify this last year. I find myself wondering how the last 365 days have past. Yet, they have.

There have been things that have happened since Brian’s death that have had a profound impact on my life. Just as Brian’s death did.

Old relationship....just doing it different now:

There was a relationship that I decided I HAD to fix. A relationship that was actually HARDER to do damaged, than it was to do it fixed. You know how they say it takes more face muscles to frown than it does to smile. Parallel that to a relationship and that is what I was doing. Stupid. So, I fixed what I was doing with it, and now I have someone in my life that I trust and love and most of all, laugh with! Thank you Brian.

New life….

Brian died June 9, 2009. 3 months later on September 9, 2009, his brother Paul Cardall received his long awaited, desperately needed, everyday prayed for, new heart.

I have had people close in my life leave this earth. Both young and old. Both a relief and a tragedy. This is my truth; I don’t know what happens after we leave this earth. But I DO know that though it seems that they have left us, we have not left them. They stay close. Brian is close. And I do believe that Brian worked hard to make sure his brother was able to continue living. I know that Paul’s life was one of the most important things to Brian. How proud Brian must have been when he knew Paul was getting an opportunity at a New Life. Thank you Brian.

September 16^th, 2009

Such an emotional day.

A day that we had all been waiting for. Even if it was while holding our breath.

Bella Aspen Cardall was going to join us. I was elated! I was also very somber.

Some may think, “What a tragedy for Bella not to know her Daddy.” And yes, I understand where that comes from. I have felt the same way at times. But again, this is MY truth; she got some serious one on one time with him for 3 months. Because I know that person that he is, and I know his heart, I know that he took very good care of her. He sent her here with a gift. If you have not ever met Bella, I hope one day you might. She is a wise old soul in a baby’s body.

She is a feeler. She connects. She doesn’t feel like a baby. She is here to watch over her mom and sister. She is such a blessing.

I remember the day that she was born. Anna was simply amazing. It was such an honor for me to be in there with her as Brian handed her off to us to take care of. When she entered this world, there was such a feeling of joy, excitement, but a very reverent peace as well. Thank you Brian.

New Family and new relationships:

I LOVE Brian’s family. The Cardalls are simply AMAZING people. All of them. And where as I may know some of them better than others, I truly feel that they are my family.

You know, I really felt like I lived consciously before Brian died. But what I know now, is that I live more consciously now. And I also know that I still have more conscious living to do. Brians death taught me that.

Since Brian’s death, I feel that I have learned, but also continue to learn how, to be with my relationships. Both with my family, and those that I am not technically related to. There are people that have been in my life that I have created better relationships with. People that have been on the side lines of my life, just waiting for my signal, I have created new relationships with. As well as others that I have found in my life, seemingly on accident, but I know that it is no accident. People that I recognize and honor the connection that we have. People that will always be, in my world, my family. I hope you know who you are.

I have learned that I always want to tell the people that I love, that I love them. Why would I want to assume that they know it? It’s my job to tell them. And, even if they all did know it, why would I not just want to say it? Its easy. And it feels good. Thank you Brian.

THE Relationship:

Who doesn’t want a good marriage? Who gets married to have a miserable marriage?

Well, it seems to be more important than ever to me to have the best marriage that I can. And I think my husband feels the same. I don’t know that it is all because of Brian’s death. But it sure has a lot to do with everything else mentioned above. So, I guess Brian’s death has something to do with that. In addition to that, my desire and consciousness to be a better mom is constantly at the surface. Even though I know I fail many times daily.

I really don’t know if it took Brian’s death for me to learn these lessons. I would like to think that I was/am still capable of learning these lessons and the value in them without losing someone that I love.

But the truth is, we will all go through the pain of losing someone we love. Numerous times. It will happen over and over again. I am doing my best to live my life as such, that when I feel the pain of losing someone again, it is not accompanied with the pain of regret.

Today many people that love Brian will honor him in climbing Mt Olympus. Later, we get to see his infectious smile and authentic laugh, as we watch home videos. Brian, I love you. I miss you daily. I am so grateful for the lessons you continue to teach me. I am so grateful for the man you are. I am so grateful for the father you continue to be to your girls. And the husband you are to Anna.

I promise to live my life in such a manner that I have minimal regrets, and maximum love. We will continue on our daily lives. Fully aware and reminded that you are physically not here, but quietly thankful for the times we are reminded that you are in fact, not gone.

Cheers to you.

Alisa

For Megan

2010-05-26T19:42:00.000-06:00

Over a month.

That is how long it has been since I blogged.

Honestly, I didn't think that it mattered much.

But then my fans....well, ok...Fan (singular...not plural) summoned me.

So, here I is.

Events that have happened over the last month.

Grace turned 8.

How on earth do I have an 8 year old?? I still feel 22!

I dont look like I am 22, nor do I move like I am 22. However, I still feel 22.

Grace is turning into such a little adult. She always has been. We didn't raise her talking to her like a child. She never did "Fawdowngoboom" (Fall down and go boom).

But what comes with an 8 year old that is a mini adult is ATT-I-TUDE!!

My land, she is a sassy pants.

She is VERY independent. To the point where she is pretty sure she needs to tell me how to do things.

I sure love her and I dont know what I would do with out her.

I took a girls trip to Oregon.

Yep. Sure did.

My friends Jen and Lindsey said to me one day; "we want to go on a girls trip and we want you to plan it".

So I did. I think with in 6 hours, I told them that we are going to Oregon.

I have ALWAYS wanted to go to the Oregon Coast.

It was well worth the wait (and weight).

So then I thought, "Duh, Sara is on of my favorite-ist people. She needs to come"

My phone call to Sara: "Hey, come to Oregon with us."

Sara: "When?"

Me:" May 6-11"

Sara:"Coo...Just bought my ticket."

Im not kidding, it took that long.

So then there we are at May 6th.

We all get in the car, get to the airport and we are on our way.

We get into Portland and take the shuttle to go get our car.

So our first interaction with an "Oregonian" is with the car rental lady.

It took me about 5 seconds to determine that she purchases a very low grade of crack that is laced with bleach from some hooker in Mexico.

For those that aren't familiar with my humor.....SHES CRAZY!!!

But then she tells me that she is from Washington.....makes sense. :)

(I kid, I kid)

Now don't get me wrong, she is super nice. Just super weird as well.

She REALLY wanted us to get the red mustang or the black chrysler 300.

Listen lady, we aren't P.I.M.P.'s . We are 30 something year old moms with 8 kids between us.

(OK, OK, Jen is responsible for half)

We go with the HHR.

Nothing says "Cougar Prowl" like an HHR.

And there were 4 of us....all on the hunt.....:)

And again..I kid.

But seriously....don't you think that HHR's are driven by cougars or those of the male gender that remain in the closet? (not that there is anything wrong with that)

Annnyyyywwwaaaaayyyyyyy........

We get our car and we are heading out of the parking lot. The attendant takes our "anything wring with this car" sheet. We ask her if there is anything close to go eat...and I am not kidding...she starts going off about 5 different places and how her sister used to date one of the owners of one of the places and how he talked her into wearing red underwear with pink socks and how her friend goes to the other place all the time because she gets cooking tips from the cook.....THAT IS A MONKEY!!!

OK, that isn't true.

BUT she really was too nice to shut up.

Super nice...wanted to answer our question....and would not shut up.

It took about 8 minutes for us to get out of there.

FINALLY we are on our way.

The car was in Lindsey's name. But she wanted me to drive. But we promised the crack head rental car lady that only Lindsey would drive. So we pulled over in a parking lot and I got in the drivers seat.

We were headed into Portland (via Washington with my mad navigating skills.. :) ) to go to Voodoo Donuts. They have the bacon-ater you know.

A maple bar with bacon on it. No lie. And guess what....it is GOOD! And that isn't a lie either.

We get there and we each order like 3 different donuts. I ordered a banana fritter that was as big as my head.

We HAVE to try them all!!

And we do.

And 10 minutes after we leave.....Sara is barfing....

But that didn't slow anything down.

We still had about a 2.5 hour trip to Florence.

It was a great road trip.

Then we get to Florence. We are staying at The Blue Heron Inn.

They boast homey, warm rooms and a gourmet breakfast.

See here, breakfast:

We stayed in a 2 bedroom..room. Well, really, it was a room with a hobbit room attached.

See here: Hobbit Room-

This was the room that Jen and I stayed in. I actually really liked it.

The other part of the room was an actual room with a king sized bed that Lins and Sara slept in.

So we get to our place of rest and we meet the host.

Maurice.

He was a cute, sweet, kinda creepy guy that was about 65 or so.

I have never seen a skinner 65 year old.

He was super nice and super informative.

He came to be VERY fond of us.

Especially Sara.....trouble in a small blonde package...as he would put it.

We have a picture of us with Maurice, but Sara has it.

I am waiting to get those pictures.

I am going to stop writing for now.

I don't want it to be so long that it is boring.

But know this: In the next post there will be.......

High class eating

Riding with Charlie

NAKED AS A JAY BIRD

I hope to have more pictures then.

I bet you cant wait.

-Paranoia in a large cheetah colored package......

Hey, Finished IS finished!!

2010-04-19T21:18:00.000-06:00

So, I really enjoyed my weekend.

It started out rough, but ended up pretty dang perfect.

Thursday night:

i forget that i am a mom and that i am responsible for a 7 year old daughter and her dietary needs. We do believe that Grace is lactose intolerant. So, we have been staying away from the cows milk as much as we can.

She was at tumbling, and I was running errands.

I stopped by Smith's and remembered how turned on I get when I pass their Olive bar.

It would be rude of me not to stop by and say hi.

I mean, we do have a pretty intense and intimate history.

So, I said hi.

And then I got some of the caprese salad that they have there.

I head over to get Grace.

We get in the car and she sees that I have the caprese salad.

She LOVES the mozzarella balls. She asked if she could have some, I said yes...and she starts chowing.

About 8 small mozzarella balls later I remember......LACTOSE INTOLERANT!!

HELLO??

Grace, stop eating that.

Well, unfortunately, Grace had to pay for my brain fart.

Later that night....stomach in knots. She couldn't eat anything else.

She went to bed with a very hurty tummy.

Then, she woke up at 430, told me she doesn't feel well, sat Marty Monkey style on my floor, and puked.

Then again.

Tye piped up with some very comforting words.....

"Pull her hair back......."

You cant buy advice like that.

I clean up the mess, get her in new clothes, get her back to bed and asleep.

The next morning, she was in no shape at all to go to school.

This is not from Lactose intolerant.

This is the stomach flu.

So I stayed home from work with her.

I had to leave later that night to get to my sister Kristins house.

See, a while back....back when we were obviously less...um, smart...we decided to sign up for the SLC Marathon Bike tour.

Now, 26 miles on a bike....really, not too hard. HOWEVER, when you have to wake up at 4 in the morning to be at the starting line at 530.......it doesn't matter if you are doing it so you can pet puppies and eat crispy cremes, that time of day makes ANYTHING hard.

On my way down to her house, I called Kristin and told her that if it windy in the morning, I AM OUT! I dont have to be a hero. Hell, I dont have to be a mediocre slob.

IM NOT BIKING IN THE WIND!

I swear, I am trying to think of something that I hate as equally as I hate riding against the wind.

I got nuthin.

So, to bed we go at midnight.

And at 1 I get a text from Tye.

Grace's fever has spiked to 103.5

he is threatening her to eat something so that he can give her some motrin.

It worked, cuz they didnt end up at the hospital.

I have never ever experienced 4 am taking forever to come around.

And this was no different.

It sneaks up on you like a little spider, and gives me the same knee jerk reaction.....KILL KILL KILL!!!

But I handled it well.

My friends brother in law was going to ride it with "us".

We call him Herb.

Who is "us" you might ask?

Well, "us" consisted of Me, my sister Kristin, friend Nicky, friend Joni, friend Nancy, and then Herb.

Well, Herb texts me at 430.

"Hey, do you think helmets are required? Will they be selling them there? I forgot mine"

Uh....we arent going to some stinky ass bowling alley where half the income comes from banking on selling socks to morons that forgot that they have to wear some 20 year old nasty, been worn by at least 200 other athletes foot, wart sportin, skin peeling, stinky feet people.....

My test: "yes, helmets required. No, they will not be selling them....."

As we pull out of Kristins neighborhood I tell her what he text and say "Who forgets their helmet..??"

She pauses...

"Wait, wheres mine....?"

yeah, on her table.

She forgets her helmet.

Then I get a call from Joni asking where i am.

She had to head back to her house cuz she too forgot her helmet.....AND her clip on shoes....

Anyway...we get there, we get ready.

We ride to the starting line....WOW, LOTS OF PEOPLE!

So, I decided that we weren't going to start at the back of the line, we were just going to mix in with the others at the front of the line.

Ready

Set

Go!

And we are off.

I brought up the rear...

Im telling you. It was a good thing that we did indeed butt in line in the front.

I would have been DEAD LAST.

Nicky stayed with me the whole time.

Now, dont get me wrong. It isnt like I dont bike.

It isnt like I have no stamina.

I just wasnt as fast as....well, most of them.

But hey, we averaged 17 miles per hour.

We ended in an hour 30.

I am proud.

It felt GREAT!!!

It was such an awesome morning!

After we got to the finish line, we met up with everyone.

We needed to ride trax back up to the U.

Joni and Nancy left. So it was just us four.

As we were waiting for Trax, Herb (who finished first with Kristin out of the 6 of us) asks me (very matter of fact, with no judgment of me or anyone else)

"So did the racers that are handicap pass you?"

NOTE***about 20 minutes after us, they had the cyclists that peddle with their hands rather than their feet, start their race. And they were indeed racing each other....we were not. We were just racing time.

That is who he was talking about. And let me preface this with this....I admire and respect anyone who doesnt let any disability get in their way***END OF NOTE

I look at him, and say...

"So are you asking me if those who started 20 minutes after us that cycle with their hands because they cant with their legs....passed me????"

He looks at me with a blank stare.....

"yes, yes they did..." I say.

But, I was not racing them.

True, if I was racing something, it better have been a lawn gnome. Because there isnt anything or anyone else that I could beat.

However, I was so proud of myself that I wore the medal, that they gave all the finishers, ALL DAY LONG.

I head home, thinking about the nap that I am going to have before Anna and Brian come over.

I get home. And I am welcomed by reality.

Reality that my husband wants to put me to work in the yard.

So, I tell him that I will work in the yard, and then I AM TAKING A NAP!

I work

He works

We both work.

And then I got to meet "My Wall".

The tired wall.

I was trying to pull up some grass with some whoppidy do da tool, and I snapped!

I threw it across the lawn and yelled "I AM DONE!!"

Tye comes over, he shows me how to do pull this grass up.

I tell him "I KNOW HOW TO DO THIS! I DONT WANT TO!!I AM DONE!!!!"

He says "Hey, Im tired too. Grace was sick last night. I didnt get much sleep."

I said- "I went to bed at midnight. Woke up, then asleep, then woke up at 4!!"

He said- "Thats about how much sleep I got too"

Me- "DID YOU RIDE 26 MILES RIGHT AFTER????"

NO!

I win.

I got a hiccup of a nap.

Time to go to the store.

Then Anna and Brian came over with the girls.

I love them.

I love them so freaking much!!

I loved having them at my house.

We had a big ole sleep over.

Then the next day the rest of my siblings came over for brunch.

It was great!!!

The weather was BEAUTIFUL!

Great company, great food, lots of love and fun.

AND, I got a medal.

Not sure how to beat it.

Alisa

i had a date.....

2010-04-14T20:56:00.001-06:00

Sooo.....I had a date.
I asked someone to go on a date with me that was neither Tye, nor someone related to me.
Ok, ok...he is practicly related to me.
On Thursday last week I text.....
BRIAN!!!

I was all "Hey, wanna go on a date?"
And he's all "Hell yeah Baby!"
And Im all "Sweet!"
Then we were both all "When?"

Saturday would be Alisa and Brian date day.

See, this isn't something that happens behind Tye or Anna's backs.
Nope.
They understand the relationship that Brian and I have.

So, we decide on dinner and a movie.
Hot Tub Time Machine to be exact.
Dinner: Ruby River

So we get to Ruby River and put our name on the list.
They ask for a last name
Brian says "Martinez"
Brian is the gringo-est, whitest boy there is.
She looks at him with a bit of a blank stare.
He says with a straight face "I wouldn't lie to you"
Then she says "Are you celebrating anything special with us tonight?"
His Answer "Our Love....."
Then turns to me as if he was reminded of something, and asks....
"So, when is your husband back in town?"
I of course, play along and say "He comes home tomorrow evening"
To which he replies "We'll have to make the most of it."

Now, he was kidding.
But the hostess and servers....they didn't know that.
They did what they could not to look obviously judgmental.
Cant say that I blame them.
Thats what we set out to do.

So, we have about a 25 minute wait.
We decide to go get our tickets....Brian was afraid they would sell out.

no worries there kiddo

So, if you have ever been to Ruby River in Jordan Commons you know that there is a big side walk between Ruby River and Last Samurai.
In the middle of this big sidewalk is a squiggly (not sure how else to explain it...limited vocab here) that goes down the middle.
Well, you cant just WALK down a big side walk that has a big squiggly down the middle....hello?
Brian says "Lets act like we are skiing down it."
Hell yeah!
He is a better skier that I am.
I did a combination of "Fwap" running (see, I had flip flops on) and side to side jumping.
He looked way better.

People looked.
People laughed.
People even clapped.

Well dear people...you are welcome.
Wait for the return show.

We get our tickets.

WHEW! As luck would have it, they were not sold out.
That was close.

So, on our way back to Ruby River.
Squiggly middle of the side walk thing...what should we do on you now?
Cant ski uphill....thats just ridiculous....
SPEED SKATING!!! DUH!

So we both got ready.
In our positions.
One leg in front of the other, crouched down a bit...and....GO!!
We took off.
We had to stay in the squiggly.
We made the "woosh, woosh, woosh" sounds as we speed skated up the squiggly.
And we had to have our form right...you know, to get as much momentum as possible.
So we each had one arm behind us up on our back, and the other out to the side swinging away with every stride.
IT. WAS. BEAUTIFUL.

And again...
Laughs.
Claps.
I even got a random score from a jealous passerby who I am sure was just wishing that her dud of a date would speed skate up the squiggly in the middle of the side walk.
She gave me a 7.
I was honored.
I would have given me a 5.
But...we ARE our toughest critics....right?

They call our name..."Martinez...party of 2"

Dinner was ok.
Dessert made Brians month.
What was it called? A Foozokie?
Big ass cookie with ice cream and fudge on top.

i wish I had dudes metabolism.

Head to the theatre.
We have to take in some arcade action.

We were going to play air hockey...but it was occupied
So Brian wanted to shoot hoops.

It was a WASTE of my money.
A blind, one armed monkey could do better than me.
(that is not meant to sound insensitive to blind, nor one armed, nor blind/one armed monkeys...or anyone for that matter)

Time to go to the movie.

I dont think I have EVER been to a movie when I have purchased items at the concession stand and FINISHED them.
Anyway, get concessions.
Head to the theater.

So, ya know the people that sit at the entrance and wait for your ticket?
Brian says out of the corner of his mouth, "Just walk by, dont even act like you are going to give her your ticket"
So we did.
nothing.
He turns to me and says "I am NEVER buying a movie ticket again....."

So we watch the movie.
It was funny.
He couldn't get comfy.
Shift, lift up the arm rest, lay on my lap, shift, put his feet up, shift, sit forward and shake his back (which means TICKLE), sit back, shift, put his head back on the back of the chair......
Brian, I love you...alot. BUT, Grace does better at a movie!
Just saying.

However, thank you for the date.
I had a super time, as I always do with you.
And...I love your guts.

Now, we just need Anna and Tye to go on a date.

One more thing
I am riding the SLC Marathon on Saturday.
26.7 miles...or whatever.
I need to average 15 miles an hour.
I got my super duper slicky cropped yoga pants today....I really do think they make me go faster...
WISH ME LUCK!!

Alisa

Perspective

2010-04-08T19:48:00.000-06:00

I think we could all use it.

Not just some of the time, but prally most of the time.

Ok, Ok...I will speak for myself.

I could use it most of the time.

I really do feel that I am conscious most of my waking hours.

By conscious, I mean, doing things on purpose. Not on auto pilot. Remembering other people. Being aware at how my actions may effect others. What others may be working through right now.

Ya know...conscious.

Today I lost my perspective for a moment.

Today is my sweethearts birthday.

My husband Tyler.

He is 34.

We have been married for almost 12 years.

I choose him again and again everyday.

So, he went hunting today. He's gonna shoot us a turkey.

He had to stop by my work to get some stuff out of my car to complete his hunting expedition.

He came in, grabbed my keys and headed outside to my car.

I followed him.

Talked to his two buddies that were going with him.

Hugged him, kissed him and sent him on his way.

About two hours later he calls me...

Me: "Hey"

Tye: BIG SIGH...."hhhheeeeeeyyyyyy"

Me: "Uh Oh, that doesn't sound good...whats up?"

Tye: "no, it isn't good. We stopped in Gunnison to get some stuff and......"

Me: "What? And...WHAT?"

Tye: "I have your Jeep keys in my pocket...."

Me: "WHAT? SON OF A......"

Tye: "I know, I KNOW....I feel terrible. But we can figure this out. You can call the dealership. they can cut a new key from your VIN number....."

Me: SIGGGGHHHHHHHH "I'll call you back. I'm going to call them and see what they can do"

Oh yeah....Gunnison is easily 100 miles south of where I am.

End result of calling the dealership...

Yes, they can make me a new key from my VIN.

BUT

They have to have the vehicle in order to program the key TO the vehicle.

The dealership is literally .25 miles from my work (Where my jeep is)

So, It has to be towed to the dealership. But, the good news is that they DO in fact have a key that they can cut for me.

However, they close in an hour and half.

Call Tye.

Tell him the story and, oh yeah, get his Credit Card number. He's footin the bill for this.

Which, to his credit, he had already offered to and totally felt that it was reasonable.

So, call the towing company, give them the payment info.

**$50.00 to tow it .25 miles...**

Call the dealership, let them know that my Jeep is coming.

Ask sister in law and life saver, Sara .......

"Please take me to get my child and then to the dealership."

She's on it.

Then I grumble a little bit about Tye and his effup.

Then, realize that SL Trib and KSL both were going to run a follow up story about my sister and her husband Brian, who was tragically killed in June.

So, I find the story.

I read it.

Breathe.

Ya know, I remember every single day that Brian is gone.

I remember every single day, how tragically he was taken from us.

I remember every single day that Bella and Ava don't get to grow up with him.

I remember every single day that Bella never met him, while on this earth.

I remember every single day how it felt when my heart was breaking when I got the news that he was gone.

I remember every single day feeling the pain of this tremendous loss for my family and his, but mostly for my sister and my nieces.

And still...even though I remember these things every single day, on days like today, when it is brought back into the light and I read the story.......I still get the wind knocked out of me.

Totally.

So as I am sitting at my desk, reading the story in the tribune about the legal battle that seems to have now begun, I cried.

And then I was nudged.

I can feel it through my body....

"Alisa, get some perspective. You know that Anna would want nothing more, than to know that her husband has her Jeep keys, in his pocket....in Gunnison. But she doesn't get to have that. You do. Get some perspective. And KEEP it."

Speed dial Tye.

No answer, voicemail.

Tearfully I leave him a message that I am not mad. I am not even frustrated. Rather that I am SO grateful.

So grateful that HE has my keys in HIS pocket, as HE is in Gunnison.

Happy Birthday Sweet Husband of mine.

I couldn't love you more.

You are the perfect man for me.

And Brian, thanks for the perspective.

xoxo

Alisa

2010-04-05T20:10:00.000-06:00

***There may or may not be words/phrases that may or may not be interpreted as "Strong Language" in this post. Avert your eyes if you are not interested in the MAY OR MAY NOT. And as always...I NEVER recommend reading my blog to the kiddos in place of a bed time story....***

How do you get THAT gig?

Seriously, I wanna know how one get these gigs.....Cuz I need to know where to send my resume.

1- Ever seen the website dickipedia.com?
Well I would LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE to be part of the team that comes up with these definitions.
Really, read it. Crass, and F.U.N.N.Y.!!

2- Who decides what to name a town, or settlement, or city?
Really. How does that work?
I have always wanted to name a town Thong, or Hair Plug..... Come on!! Why not?
I mean, my land! There's already:
Boar Tush, AL.
What about Manley Hot Springs, AK?
Or...Jot Em' Down Store, GA....NO LIE!
Big Beaver Lick, KY ?????

I mean, I get it. There are some towns/cities that were named what they were named, simply for Geographical purposes.
Like...Stump Town, MT
Or Dripping Springs, TX

But Sugar Tit, SC???
REALLY!! I WANT THIS JOB!!

3- Beer taster
Now, I haven't needed to look for a job for quite a few years (knock on wood)
But I KNOW that I never saw an add for BEER TASTER. Cuz I would have applied!!
Now, I don't LOVE beer. But I do appreciate it. Especially since my husband started brewing his own.
It is all very intriguing.

About a year ago, I REALLY wanted to get out of dodge, move to Missoula, MT and open up a bakery.
The premise of my bakery? What ever the hell I wanted.
From day to day. Always different.
The name of the bakery? : "Whatever I Want"
I envisioned it being the place where people came to eat Whatever I Wanted.
They would love it.
They would try things that they have never tried before.
It would be warm.
It would have odds and ends hanging from the ceiling and the walls.
It would be consistently inconsistent.
I would serve hot drinks like Cinnamon Hot cocoa to Hotty Totty's, and everything in between.
But more than coming in for the warm, welcoming ambiance, or the amazing baked goods....people would come just to talk to me.
Actually, what I want is to be the one that decides what is made everyday (mostly because, well, lets be honest...I dont bake very well) have someone else make it, and sit in a big ole comfy chair and a half in the corner of the bakery, and sit and talk to people.
They would come to me with their joys and sorrows.
They would want advice and an ear to bend.
They would poor their guts out, and they would allow that for me as well.
We would cry, laugh, sit in silence, talk about our fears, what we don't want to know, what we already knew, and how we could save the world....starting with our own.

Yeah....How do I get THAT gig?

xoxoxoxo
Alisa

2010-03-31T14:23:00.000-06:00

My pet peeves:

Pet Peeve #1:

Conversation used only to talk. No purpose. No Value. It doesn't even fill in the silence. Just because I pass you in the hall or the isle of the grocery store or in the lobby of a common place we both visit, doesn't mean that every time our space intertwines, something...anything.... needs to be said.

Let me demonstrate:

Me walking down the hall of a....lets go with a church. (Hey, I am sure there are a few that would still allow me..)
Here comes someone I know.
I see them often.
It isn't any sort of occasion when I do see them. No need for conversation.
However, something is said to fill the 1 millisecond of silence that will occur as we pass each other...something pointless and stupid like:
"Hey, why you gotta make it snow?"

REALLY?
SERIOUSLY?
I am 33.
And you are...well, of adult age.
I am well aware that I am not the one that makes it snow....or makes it stop.
And considering the venue of which we have just crossed paths....you should know that too. I'm not interested in taking blame, or props from The Man Upstairs.

Pet Peeve #2:

Don't ask ME a question about something that you don't know the answer to, THEN question my answer!!!

Allow me to demonstrate:

Other person that is not me: "Hey Alisa, did you remember to lock the door?"
Me: "yes"
OPTINM: "ARE YOU SURE?"

OH. MY. LORD.

Thinking...thinking...Did I say "Hmmmm...I'm not sure if I locked the door..."?

NOPE

YES I AM SURE!!!
My response is equally parallel to my action.
I KNOW I LOCKED THE DOOR! THAT IS WHY I SAID "YES" WHEN YOU ASKED!!
Here, do this.... you should just ask me if I have ovulated, then when I tell you NO, question that too!

Pet Peeve #3

Call me
I answer
You say "Hang on" or "Hey, I gotta call you back"

No big rant here.
I just get annoyed at that.

Ok, I gotta stop.
I'm gonna stroke out.

Share with me your pet peeves so that I don't have to think that I am impatient, bitchy and irrational.

Off to find some aspirin...

A

Dear Someone

2010-03-19T09:32:00.000-06:00

So, I have a couple of blogger friends that do posts called "Dear Someone".
I love them.
You know who you are.
So here is the deal......I am soooooooooo copying you.

Its the highest form of flattery....right?
Right.

So here is my first "Dear Someone"

Dear Ole Dear...ME...

Tell me, why is it when you are urged to do something, by none other than YOURSELF (you know, the still small voice...that when ignored, turns into Ms. Graham from my 2nd grade class at Westvale Elementary who used a ping pong paddle to whack on your desk when you were day dreaming, talking, or when she needed to get some anger out....where was I?)
Oh yeah....by none other than YOURSELF....WHY DO YOU IGNORE IT??
All that leads to is emotional and mental self mutilation.
You know EXACTLY what I am talking about.

Yesterday, when you were heading into Albertsons to get an avocado, do you remember the elderly couple coming out?
Do you remember watching the cute little old man, with a total of 10 hairs on his head, 100 liver spots on his body, and glasses that swallowed his face?

Do you remember seeing him pull the cart full of groceries with one hand and push his sweetheart, with her tightly curled silver hair, and sunglasses that looked like she just got her eyes dilated, in her wheelchair, with his other hand?

Yeah, that's right.....pushing his wife in her wheelchair with one hand, and pulling the cart behind him with his other hand.

Do you remember what you thought?

Of course you do.

Its been bugging you for the last 24 hours.
You thought "Oh, hey, I should take his cart for him"
Then for some reason that I have yet to figure out, the next thought was "Na, he's got it".

DID THIS LOOK EASY FOR HIM?
My land!!! Dudes 90...AT LEAST!
Your 33, and it would take some skills to do it yourself.

So....then, as you walk into the store, do you remember the conversation that we had with each other? (I bet you, the reader, may be wondering how many of "us" are in this pretty little head.....I wish I knew)

Me: "Dammit Alisa!! Why didnt you help them? You physically could feel yourself move over there, and it was harder to stop you...yet you stopped you....WHY?"
Me: "Hell Alisa....I DONT KNOW!!!"
Me: "Well my gosh! LISTEN TO ME NEXT TIME!! I KNOW WHAT I AM DOING!!"
Me: "Ok, Ok....I know, I just need to trust you."
Me: "Good.....you dumb ass"

**Reader...you may think that it stops here.
That I learned my lesson. (Believe me, this is not the first time I have had to learn this lesson) But, surely not to disappoint.....it doth not end-eth here..eth**

So...dear, dear, dumb ass me.....tell me this.
When you were leaving, do you remember seeing same said couple putting groceries in their car?
Do you remember thinking, "I really should go help him fold that wheelchair and put it in the trunk"?
Then, do you remember, as you were driving off in your car, looking in the rear view and watching him do it...and, Im not gonna lie, struggle a bit doing it?
Tell me, what did you do about that?
Oh yeah....you turned right on to 200 West, and drove to work.

Just remember. You didnt hurt that cute little old man.
You didnt hurt his wife.
They didnt battle with themselves about why the spry 30ish looking lady didnt help them.

Nope.

You did, however, hurt yourself.
You totally and completely betrayed yourself.

I am sure that we will have this talk again, about something else.
So I am not going to tell you not to betray yourself again.
However, I would like it to be fewer and further between.

Take care of you, and those around you.

Me.

2010-03-17T21:57:00.000-06:00

K.... I swear... I totally had NO IDEA my daughter could do......
this

My apologies.....

2010-03-16T16:31:00.000-06:00

So, I feel like I had good reason to make my blog private.
Its MY blog.
But then I found that when I would log on to check out all the blogs that I follow, I would look to see how many comments I had on my last post.
**Just in case you are wondering, my last post was approx. 528 hours ago.....or 31,680 minutes ago, for those who are extreme****
Needless to say, my selfish mind would be sad that there was not more, if any, comments on my posts.

Ok...so I am aware of what you may be thinking...dont comment whats in your head right now.
I KNOW how all that sounds.
1-Go Private
2-Invite only a handful of people to view your blog
3-Get offended because the 15 people that CAN view your blog dont comment on your posts that are so few and far between

D.U.H.

So, I have made it public once again.
Those that were invited to read it below...please continue to read it. This doesnt mean that you are any less special.
Actually...you should feel relieved.
It is no longer only up to the 15 of you to make my blogger life worth living.

I have not felt well over the last couple of days.
I think that I will be much better tomorrow.

Lets stay friends....mmmkkaaayyyy?

This is how-

When you call my place of employment to talk to someone other than me, and I tell you that said other person is on the phone...
please, please, PAH-LEASE....dont ask me how long said person will be on the phone.
Here is what I would like to know......
What special powers is it you think I have in order to know when someone will be done with a phone conversation........???
Future See-er?
Nope, not his chic.
AND....if I could have a special power, it would not be that.
What a downer. See, if someone could see into the future, that doesnt mean that they can change it.
What it does mean is NO MORE SURPRISES!!
Who wants that?
Not me.

If I could have a special power, I think that it would be to change someones mind.
Think of the POWER!!!
Think of the possibilities.....
Think of the FUN!!!

Trust me, it would be fun.

2010-02-22T12:58:00.000-07:00

So since i told HCG to to go and eff itself, this blog can no longer be dedicated to my HCG journey.

Unless I lose weight.
Then I will tell you.

However, it will be dedicated to whatever else I want to talk about.

Like this:
Yesterday we had a family get together for my sister Erin and Brother Erik birthdays.
We had a fiesta.
There were Margaritas.

Anna and I were in the kitchen. (she is a GREAT hostess)
We were talking about how much fun we have with our family and how much we love each other.
The whole day I was thinking....
"K, this is cool....cuz its a family get together with everyone that is already part of the family...and everyone that will be part of the family as well"
It was a sneak peek.
A glimpse of what it will be.
How it should be.

I get it.
I may be jumping the gun here.
But then Anna said it first.

yeah, we're talking about Brian and Jason.
The new additions.
Jason belongs to Kristin and Brian belongs to Anna.
Remember me talking about Tyes friend Brian that I love so much?
Well, thats him.

Now, dont think that I set Anna and Brian up.
I surely did not.
In fact, I worked against it.....kinda. Only cuz Anna told me that is what she wanted.
Then she came to her senses.
She is glad she did.
I am glad she did.
I know both Brians are glad that she did too.

Now Kristin and Jason.
Well. Let me tell you what he has done to her.
She is soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo happy.
She smiles A LOT!
She is soft, open, and vulnerable.
Not the norm for the not so flattering nick named "ice-princess".
(no lie....but dont worry, she knows this.....im not tellin any secrets)

Both my sisters are being taken care of.
In the ways the everyone wants and deserves.
Kristin....for the first time.
And Anna...in a way she thought she may have lost...forever. But she hasnt.

Some may say that it isnt common to find such love.
But I disagree.
I dont think this kind of love is a miracle.
I think we all have it to give.
We all want to receive as well.
Its just a matter of being open to it.
Or you can choose not to be.

I want to share a video with you.
Most, if not all, of you have seen it.
I posted it on my Facebook.

This is footage that Annas husband Brian Cardall took of them when they were in Peru on there honeymoon.
Brians amazing brother Paul put it to his music.
It is to his song Sweet Escape.
It is such a touching tribute.

After the first 20 times I watched it, I thought "Man, I hope one day I can watch this with out being an emotional mess."
But the truth is....no I dont.
The emotional mess that I am when I watch it is proof to me of my love for Brian and for Anna.
The emotion is sadness, but also joy.
You have to be a robot not to feel the love they have for each other. Not to feel the genuine love that Brian has for people. Not to feel the pure truth in the goodness that he is.
I dont want to be a robot.

***Ok, so since this post, the author of this song and video removed it from You Tube....WTH? Im gonna have to have some words with that man.... :) So sorry. Not here now. But as soon as it is available again, I will post it.****

Test yourself and see......

Sweet Escape

Please....tell me what you think....

in the word of Gracie to her dad over text..... "I Hart you so much!"

Alisa

bad words with drops

2010-02-18T09:57:00.001-07:00

by noon yesterday (first day on drops from my scheduled interuption) I told hcg to screw itself.

More drops.....

2010-02-16T14:58:00.000-07:00

Back to where I ended.
NICE!

I was going to start my drops again today, but I think that I will start them tomorrow.
Just for 10 more days.
I can do that.
Easy Breezy
'Sept this time, I will continue to take my vitamins.

I need to get prepared tonight.
Get some chicken, asparagus, tomatoes, cabbage and other stuff.....I gotta think of what. Oh yeah, cucumbers.
I really dont want to do it again, but I want to maybe lose 10 lbs more.

So, I have not posted a funny Grace story for a while.

She LOVES to use my phone to text people.
Actually, she has only text 2 people.
Friend Brian is the one that she loves to text the most.
He responds to her and will have a text conversation with her.

ANYWAY.....
Last week she asked me if she could text Brian again.
I told her no. He was at a meeting with Tye.
Then she asked me if she could text my sister Anna.

I told her no.
She asked why.
I told her "Because, Anna is in Arizona."

pause..............................................................

Graces response:

"What...there's no texting in Arizona...........?"

Um....yeah...I guess there is.
Here is my phone.

Lesson: If you are going to say no and have a reason why, that reason needs to be a better one than why the answer should be yes.
Thanks for the lesson oh wise 7 year old.

Love, Love...weight gain....

2010-02-15T10:38:00.001-07:00

So, this last weekend, we staffed The Couples Training at The Great Life Foundation.
What an awesome thing.
Really.
I am so grateful that I get to really show my husband how much I love him.
And he gets to show me as well. So vulnerable, so honest.
All of the outside, daily noise is put to rest for 3 days, and it is just US.
Gracious.
I love him so much and I am so grateful that he chooses me. Every day.

However, I was not as Nazi as I could have/maybe should have been with my eating.
I was sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo afraid to get on the scale this morning.
Tye weighed himself last night.

There was NO WAY I was going to torture myself by weighing myself at night.

So, we went to the gym last night.
Walking, Biking and running.
Worked my abs, legs and my back muscles. (Seriously have NO idea what the muscles are called)

The scale this morning said I gained 1.4 lbs from Thursday.
I am okay with that.
Since I was pretty sure it would say 10 lbs.

Drops tomorrow for 10 days.

Then, continue at the gym.
Got some biking to do.

Steak Day, Schmeak Day

2010-02-10T09:41:00.000-07:00

Not even a pound down.

Ugh!

I figure I will just continue to get me calories in with good, clean foods.
And healthy fats.
Then, continue with the gym.

That can only lead to good things....right?

On the positive side....I ordered some pants from Old Navy.
I ordered a smaller size cuz I thought that at least I will be able to fit into them soon enough.
Well....they are too big.

WOOT WOOT!!

Ah-lee

Here's the truth....

2010-02-09T16:29:00.000-07:00

My sister made me very aware of how often I say that.
Here's the Truth...I am already aware of how often I say that. :)

Wanna know why I say that?
Well, cuz I prefer to only speak the truth.

Its my way of keeping me in check.
Making sure that I am, indeed, giving the truth.

So, along the lines of truth...I have decided that I am going to dedicate this blog to my quest to be skinnier, healthier, and HAWTER!

So, I will post my losses, my gains, my struggles, my conquers, my goals and my achievements. (Is that a word?.....it is now)

So.
As of this morning.
Since October 9th 2009
I have lost 57 lbs.
I feel great.
Some of you may not know how though.

I jumped on the HCG wagon.
My sisters and my dad had done it.
Monika lost 70 lbs.
One day Kristin just asked me if I wanted to do it.
See...I had been resistant before.
I had my ideas that supported my resistance.
But it truly changed in a matter of .8 seconds.

Question posed: "Hey, you wanna do this with us this round?"
Question answered: "Sure"

Now, as you read the two sentences, do you see the space between them?
Ya know, between the top one and the bottom one?
Not much room huh?
Well, in this itsy bitsy space lies miles and miles and miles of thought.
All that was processed in the amount of time that the little space represents. (Like I said .8 seconds)

So the question, thought and answer really looked like this:
Question Posed: "Hey you wanna do this with us this round?"

-What will happen if I am hungry?

-Just my luck, I will be the only person on the earth that this will not work for.

-Not only not work for, but have reverse affects. I will gain weight at an amazing speed.

-What if it does work.

-What if I can be skinnier

-What if I can do things that I cant do now

-What if I am happier

-What if my husband is more attracted to me.

-What if OTHER people think I am attractive

-What if Grace follows in my foot steps and is overweight and unhappy

-What if she doesn't.

-Can I do this?

-YES! I can do ANYTHING!

-You are so gonna do this.

-HELL YEAH I AM! And I am going to ROCK IT!!
Question Answered: "Sure"

Let me tell you.
Not easy.
And....not the hardest thing that I have done. Nor will I ever do.

I learned that I am very powerful. I learned that I am the one that is in control...if I choose to be.
I learned that being in control comes with big responsibility. And choosing not to be in control means choosing to let go of responsiblity.

Seriously, I can do anything for 30 days....right?
I can choose to make it the best it can be, or I can choose to rely on my ole trusty excuses, and let things remain as they are.

Well, I chose not to let things remain the same.

So, I look different.
It is obvious.
Some people comment.
Some people dont.
Some people lift me up and let me know how great my progress is.
And some people choose to point out how far I have left to go.
But, whatever.
I am aware that I do this for no one else other than myself.

So I will let this post be the first of the recording the daily (or sumphin like that) trek for me.
Right now I am doing no sugar no starches.
I need to eat at least 1500 calories a day.
I am having a hard time getting that in.

Yesterday, I think I ate 900 calories, and burned 400 at the gym. (BTW...first day at the gym)

Mathematically, it may seem great. But my body freaked out and I had a 3 lb weight gain this morning. So I then freaked out.

On this part of the diet, if you gain more than 2 lbs in the morning, that DAY you have to do what is called a "Steak Day".

What you do on a "Steak Day" is this.

You eat nothing...all day long.

Only drink water.

Then for dinner you have the fattiest 16 oz Ribeye you can find and one whole tomato, raw.

Then magically the weight comes off.

I have yet to find someone that says it doesnt work.

I will let you know in the morning.

aLiSa

Nope, not weird at all.

2010-02-08T14:12:00.000-07:00

I have always been of the belief, or thought, that if something doesn't feel weird, awkward, or unfamiliar, then it must be right. That's not to say that weird, awkward or unfamiliar is WRONG.
I'm just saying that if it feels familiar...it must be right....at least for the moment.

That's how this feels.
Its always felt this way.
Even before it was something that actually WAS.

This is not even about me. But the way that I love it, you would think that it was about me.

Its "her"
Its "that guy"

I am the happiest girl alive.

BTW.
I only extended this private invitation to view my blog to 12 people.
One of which, you are.
I'm just tellin ya, so that when you see the hawt (not inappropriate) pics that I will be posting, you might get an idea about how special you are.......
Just sayin'.

2010-01-22T22:36:00.000-07:00

Tonight I am hurt and I am pouting.

I am sure I will be over it tomorrow.

But I am hurt by someone elses actions....or lack thereof.

Why on earth do I make this hurt, really.....hurt?

Isn't it a choice?

Cant I choose to feel bad and be hurt, or choose to not let someone elses actions affect me?

So here I am....really wanting to put my walls up, again.

I want to protect myself.

And actually, I prally need to protect myself, from myself.

Here is where I have gotten myself in trouble this time-

I have a really hard time with relationships sometimes.

For many reasons.

I give MORE than I demand back. I just assume that the other party will follow my lead. But then they don't, and I tell myself that it is ok. I can do it their way. But I don't communicate any of the hurt with them that may come along....well, that DOES come along, with doing a relationship like that. I teach them to treat me unfairly. I don't do anything about it being unbalanced, therefore I create the unbalanced relationship. I don't feel that I am worthy to get what I give in the relationship. Like, this is what I owe them for putting up with being in a relationship with me. Oh, don't think that this continues on and on.

Nope.

I don't let it.

But not by getting clear with the other party.

nope.

I cut all strings.

Sianara!

Adios!

And I don't do this with all of my relationships.

In fact, I would say that I do this with a very very very small percentage of my relationships.

I would dare say that the bulk of my relationships are an understanding as to where we connect, and then we each do our thing from there. No expectations. Just know that I love you and we will be together when we are together.

I need to figure out the connection with the ones that I do this with though.

What is it about this person....or me in regards to this person...that I feel like I need to step in front of a bus for them. And they will let me.

Hmmm.....I don't know how much sense this makes.

It just comes down to this.

I am hurt.

Regardless if it makes sense, or if I shouldn't be hurt, or if I am over reacting....

I am hurt.

I REALLY hope that I haven't hurt anyone else like this.

I bet I have.

I am sorry.

****So, I wrote the above on Friday night. Today is Monday. Things are better.
I was really caught off guard with how hurt I was. Really, I was HURT.
But I am no longer.
This person and I got things cleared up.
It meant alot to me that the next day, my phone was blowing up with texts from said (actually UN-said) individual. Ya, know...trying to just get back to "normal". Said friend was trying to patch things up and make sure we were ok.
Truth is, I knew that we would be ok.
I love said friend too much to leave.
But what was nice was that the question was posed from said friend....
"Do you hate me because of Friday....I am really really sorry".

My answer...of coarse not.
Hate is such a strong word.
I don't think there is anyone that I would say I hate.
I let said friend know that I was hurt.
It gave me an opportunity to get it off my chest, and be completely honest with said friend about how said friend doesn't/hasn't shown up in our relationship.

Said friends response: "MAN! You are never a mean person, but what you said HURTS!"
My response: "I understand your intentions....but these are our results."

Since then, Said Friend has made quite the effort.
And said friend has been sober while making the effort.
(some of the source of the hurt)

I love that I have relationships that I want to fix. I love that I have relationships with people that I can say..."Hey, the way you are doing (or NOT doing) this hurts me."
And that it matters enough that things can be right again.

My relationships mean alot to me.
They are a reflection of the person that I am .
If you are in a relationship with me, trust that you will get the honest Alisa.
Its not always easy to be honest with people.
But I don't know how to do it different.
This is where I stand to get clobbered.
Since I choose to be honest in my relationships, I trust, or rather expect, that the other party is honest with me.
So I never second guess or question the relationship, or what is being said.
But that is not always the case.
So that is where I get clobbered.

But ya know what?
I will not change who I am.
Even if it means that I get clobbered less.
I would rather get clobbered, than betray myself.
I would be the only one that loses in that scenario.
No way would I win.

So, please let me know if the way that I do our relationship hurts you.
I never want to hurt anyone.
Especially the ones that I love.

xoxoxoxo

Ah-lee ;)

Music

2010-01-18T18:23:00.000-07:00

I love music.
What would we do with out it?
Really!
What if you NEVER got to have a song stuck in your head?
Hey, I will take The Wiggles or Dora in my head any day over nothing at all.
Sometimes, I wake up with a song that is my head, and no lie, my day will parallel that song.
Sometimes it is good thing.....other times not

I know I have posted my "Favorites....for right now" here before.
I have had them on a play list too.
I will get that back up.

This is a list of songs that I listen to everyday.
Some, for the last week.
Some for longer.

Engineers- (I effed up, so these first three songs are not on the playlist you can listen to, but I will fix it)
*Home
*Forgiveness
*Come In Out of the Rain
*Waved On

India.Arie-
*Beautiful
***I don't think I will EVER EVER EVER EVER get sick of this song. EVER!

Passion Pit-
*Sleepyhead
*Moths Wings

Pink Floyd-
*Coming Back To Life
*Learning to Fly
*The Turning Away
***Ok, really.....honestly...truthfully...how does it get any better than Pink Floyd? Ok, I get it. There are two types of Pink Floyd. There is the Syd Barrett Pink Floyd and the David Gilmour Pink Floyd. If you are a fan of Pink Floyd, you may prefer one over the other....as I do. My preference? Well, clearly, based of the 3 songs above, I am a David Gilmour fan.
But even with the paranoid and angry Syd Barrett, really.....You cant get better than Pink Floyd.
K. I am off my PF soap box.

Q-Tip
*Life Is Better (Featuring Norah Jones)

****K, here is the explanation. I get it....you're prally thinking...."Um Alisa, you know that you are a white, fat, uncool mom.....right?" Yes, I am aware of all of those things. However, it will change. Well, all of it but the White part.
I have a friend that introduced me to this song. I liked it. I like most anything with a good beat. Norah adds to it. I have listened to alot of other Q-Tip songs, but none that I have wanted to commit to. So, as I was saying. My friend introduced me to this song last year. Its on my gym play list. Sometimes I like to know the words to the songs I like, and other times, I don't like to bother. This one I started getting down with out really realizing it. It wasn't an conscious effort I was putting forth.
One say I asked said friend "Do you know the lyrics to Life Is Better?"
His response- "I wish"
End result:
I am going to "out Q-Tip" said friend.
I knew that I wasn't going to see him for at least a couple of weeks, if not more.
And by the time I saw him again, I would have it all down.
So, that is why I have been listening to it everyday. And because I like it.
I am about 65% with the lyrics.
They aren't easy.
Look them up and give it a listen.

-Radiohead
*High and Dry
*House of Cards
*No More Surprises

-Ryan Adams
*Wonderwall

***Ok, before I get a scolding from my from Nicky....I love Ryan Adams. And I listen to him ALL the time. However, this is the one that I listen to daily.

Check 'em out.

Christmas and such

2010-01-12T15:22:00.000-07:00

I found myself being angry that some blogs I follow have not posted in a while.
Then I realized how hypocritical that is.

Sometimes I don't think that I have anything to write about. And sometimes I actually don't. But other times, I just have to be quiet for a second, and think about what has happened over the last few weeks.

I had to look to see if I had posted anything since Christmas.
Nope, I didn't.

Christmas is great and wonderful and CAN be magical.....but seriously, lets face it.......Christmas is a commercialized pain in the ass. And I buy into it every year.
This year was the worst. Not necessarily buying into the whole commercialized BS part.....but rather procrastinating and such, therefore not really getting into the true meaning, or the magic of it.

Everyone has there own "True Meaning" of Christmas.
For me, my "True Meaning" of Christmas is quality time spent with loved ones. Reconnecting with the real relationship you have with those close to you. Service. Totally about service.
Ugh! I am so mad at myself that I let those things slip.
I was so caught up in other things, that I allowed myself to get stressed out about what I thought others expectations of me were (not cuz they told me....they don't know. I know your expectations of me and your judgments better than you ever could....right?)

Last year I approached my family with the idea of serving a family for Christmas.
Everyone of us have what we need, and pretty much what we want.
The last thing I wanted from anyone was some clearance gadget from Bed Bath and Beyond.
And I sure as hell wasn't interested in purchasing same said gadget for anyone else.
So, instead of any of us buying anything for each other, we would put that money towards a family.
It was a great experience.

So, I wanted to do the same thing year.
In fact I wanted to do multiple families.
One that the Schmidt Family could serve. One that the Boulter/McDonald Family could serve. And one that we could serve with our friends. (Cuz here is the truth...we have kick ass friends)
Ask me if ANY of them happened.

Wait...don't.

It will make me feel bad about it all over again.
What did I do instead?

Did I get my shopping done early? Nope.
Done by Dec 1st? Nope
Done by mid Dec? Nope
Actually, DONE would imply that at one point I even started. So lets start over.
Start my shopping early? NOPE
Start my shopping by December 1st? NOPE
START my shopping by MID DECEMBER??? NOPE!!!

I started my shopping December 21st.
And I hated every moment of it.
And all I had to really shop for was Tye and Grace.
Tye is a "what do I buy Tye" disaster from hell anyway. Really. I get it that I may exaggerate at times.....but this is not one of the times. The fact that I have to call his friends to get ideas about what to get him, lets you know how bad of a wife I really am. I made him agree that this year he will not buy anything for himself after September 1st.
Seriously, throw us a bone here.

I had the entire week of Christmas off, and it was not relaxing. Not at all. It was hectic and fast and stressful.
It is no one elses fault but my own.

I will do better this year.

This year, we will serve a family. (Maybe more)
This year, we will spend quality time with those that we love.
This year, it will feel magical and yummy.
This year, my house will smell like pine trees and gingerbread cookies.
This year, my house will be decorated with cute little holiday crafts that Grace and I do.
This year, there will be no tension, no stress about what to get someone. Because there will only be 2 people that I buy for.
I am going to be straight up honest. Other than Tye and Grace, there was only ONE person of all the others I purchased gifts for, that I was excited about. Truly....ONE!
That's CRAP!

So then Christmas was over.
Whew!

Next, New Years.

Here is the short version:

Rather than focusing on New Years, we had a "Brian Is Gooder Than Hell" party for our friend (and one of my favoritest people) Brian.

It was fun.
It was crazy.
At times dramatic.
But we were super glad to celebrate his birthday at our house.

However, it took us about 4 days to clean the house.

I am glad the chance of that happening again is a year away. :D

And lastly.....
3 days after I got my Jeep. Tye totaled his truck.
But, it was totaled.
So we will see what they will pay us for it, and Tye will get a new truck .
I think he was just jealous of my Jeep.
Truly.
I am not kidding.

And, I am sorry if you get to be one of the recipients of Graces message......
If you are, it will sound like this.....

"Hey there Sonny- Names Everett. These two soggy sonsabitches are Pete and Delmar." Followed by her famous Bart Simpson laugh.
Who am I kidding, I am not sorry if you get that message. Consider yourself lucky if you do.
Its funnier than hell!
So far there has only been two people that she has left that message for.
I wouldn't let her call Gma and Gpa.....so sorry.

Go ahead. Judge Me.

A

Pictures

2009-12-15T10:52:00.000-07:00

Here are some pictures of the tattoo process.

I love you Erin. Thanks for coming and listening to me talk inappropriately with Nic. :)
However, you are a crappy phone photographer. :)
LOVE YOU!!

Nic is good. He did my foot.
He is a nice guy. Funny.
Not gonna lie, a bit intimidating at first.
But I realized that if I am the first to throw out an inappropriate, off color comment....that tends to make the mood soften.
Ya know. Mellow out.

Tell me who is intimidating after they are told that it is ok if they touch my boob.
Ok. Condition.
It has to be an accident.

Intimidation.....gone.

See, I told you.
Inappropriate.

Those who love and know me well would not, if fact, DO NOT expect anything less.

Things are changing kids.
I can feel it.
Some notice it.
I notice it.
I talk to myself about it.

I laugh more.
I smile more.
I tend to be more outgoing.
I am more confidant.
I try new things.

I dig it.
I dig it alot.

Wanna see my family?
As in my parents, brothers and sisters?

Here are my parents....sorry ma and pa, I had to post this one.

Oldest Sister Monika.....isnt she hot?

Monika's son Noah with my brother Erik.

Sister Kristin.....nuther hottie....

This is where I come in. 3rd kid.
The reason the rest of them exist. No lie. Ask my mom....when she wakes up. :)

Kristins boys Jordan and Zach.

Brother Erik with his wife Jana and two kids Kannon and Nakaia.

Anna (my sunshine) with late husband Brian (love you B!) and Ava

Flash dancer Ava

Anna and Baby Bella

Brother Matt and his wife Alisa.

Sister Erin and Girlfriend Midge

Doesnt my family rock?
I mean, ok, so most of you have not met them, but just look at them. They rock!
Which leads me to continue to wonder....where the hell did I come from?
Not that I dont rock.
But look how hawt they all are.
I got robbed.

Seriously, WTF?

Oh well, I am the funniest.
I will still be funny when I am old and wrinkly and beauty has fallen to the floor like cigarette ashes, and swept under the moldy ole rug.

So there.

Alisa

2009-12-13T17:27:00.000-07:00

Hi!

Its freakin cold out there!! My Gosh!

Tye spent most of the day plowing the neighborhoods driveways.

He is funny.

We have a Polaris Ranger. (Ok, it really is his)

He put the shovel on it and went to town today.

All the neighbors came out and thanked him, then asked him to do the next neighbor.

Then he went to another neighborhood, across from Antelope Drive. He wanted to go plow our friends, Mike and Jen, driveway.

I dig him.

Alot.

He just got back from a C-R-A-Z-Y buffalo hunt.

Yep, buffalo.

He was gone for about 10 days.

Grace and I went up there last weekend.

We really had a great time.

While we were there, Tye had his brother Yale, his buddies Brian, Mike, Herb and Jerry there as well.

For a half a second, I thought "I am not sure that I want to hang out with all the dudes".

Duh!

HELLO?

Truth is, I have always hung out with the dudes better than the chics.

Thats not to say that I dont have girlfriends that I consider sisters.

Just, as a whole, I do the dude thing better.

Brian and Yale

Brian, Tye and Yale

Brian, Mike, Yale and Tye

I am lucky though. Cuz I love all of Tye's friends. Serious. I know women who are disgusted by and HATE their husbands friends.

I really do love them. I have a friendship with about 95% of them outside of the friendship that they have with Tye. Really, his friends are our family. Especially these guys.

I think that is groovy.

So this last weekend was nothing but fun.

Turnin up the Ipod in the RV and dancin, sitting by the fire playing STUPID games **wink at Brian** (Still fun), sittin in the tent while Yale and Tye jam on their guitars, then going out to look for the buffalo.

Really, I cherish these times, and I am so thankful that I get to have them. And specifically this weekend, that I got to have the time with Brian, Mike, Yale and Tye. (And Jerry and Herb, but they didnt stay long).

So, for years, Tye has been a pretty serious hunter. He is so freakin smart about it. People come to him constantly about hunting. Whether it is about where to hunt, how to hunt or when to hunt (and everything in between). He knows his stuff. Anyway, I have never gone hunting with him. I really am not interested in killing something. But I have no judgement about anyone else hunting. Plus, we eat everything he hunts.

In the 12 years that we have been together, I have never ever ever ever shot a bow. That is until last Saturday.

I picked up Graces bow (which is adjusted to a 7 year old) and just started trying to figure it out.

Now, it isnt brain surgery.

Hell, it isnt even Oral Surgery. But still, it isnt like you pick it up and you are just good at it.....well, unless you're me. :)

I played for about 3 hours straight while listening to Pink Floyd and Aerosmith.

It was good.

When Tye got back that night from glassing (and whatever else), once I got past my furry, I let him know that he gets to buy his wife a bow.

The next day, he adjusted Graces bow so my draw was alot further, and he set it to a higher poundage. (I am just pulling this lingo out, I have no idea if what I am saying is right or not)

Since my draw was alot farther than Graces, I needed to use longer arrows.

Thanks Brian.

He let me use his arrows.

I am not sure how far I shot from. But really, I kicked it!

No lie.

It totally turned Tye on.

Hell, I was turned on.

So, my point.

Shooting a bow is fun. And I didnt know that I would like it or be somewhat decent at it.

I cant wait to go shoot it again.
Really.
I think about it numerous times daily.
Like right now.
I am totally thinking about it this second.

So when Grace and I left, we left in a hurry. Snow was coming, and it was coming soon.

Tye and the boys had to pack up camp and move down lower. So I packed up and left in a hurry.

And we still got stuck in Price.

I was pretty pissed.

Not that I could have done anything about it. But I was still pissed.

I told Tye that it was BS that I didnt have a vehicle with 4 wheel drive.

This is the only time since we have been married that I have not had it.

Before I had a Cherokee, and before that I had a truck.

So, I warned him that by the time that he gets home from the hunt (Which was about 6 days later) I would have purchased a new vehicle. One with 4 wheel drive.

So guess what I did.

I bought a 2007 4 door Jeep Wrangler Unlimited X.

Yep.

I am STOKED!!!

I bought it out of Arizona. So I dont have it yet. But I should have it by the end of the week.

I am so stinkin excited.

Anywhoooo....last night I got a tattoo.

Number 4.

I LOVE IT!! Its for Grace. She loves dragonflies.
I was so stoked when this one happened. I am pretty sure no one else has this on their body.

Then I found another one that I will be getting. It represents the love between a mother and her daughter.

Seriously awesome.

Funny Grace:

Today we were making gingerbread men to hang on our tree.

Well....I burned the last batch.

She looked in the oven before I could get to them and said, "Hey mom, you burned the little bastards...."

WHAT?

She looks at me like she is in trouble.....and says "I was going to say that I didnt think that was a bad word, since dad says it....but dad says alot of bad words. So its bad huh?"

My reply: "Bad enough that it shouldnt come out of the mouth of a 7 year old."

My stern/suprised looked didnt hang around long. It was too funny.

Later Skater

Alisa

2009-11-23T15:52:00.000-07:00

This is not a pretty post.
So if you cant handle hearing about animals ACCIDENTALLY getting hurt, you may want to leave.

So yesterday was a yummy day.
Cold outside, warm inside. House clean (somewhat), Grace watching movies, and I am trying on a few sugar free/starch free thanksgiving recipes.

I had like 7 candles burning in the house. It smelled good.

It started snowing at about 4. It was nice. It was pretty.
Later I decided I needed to get a few things at the store. So Grace and I got in the car.
We went to the store, turned in all her change for a small fortune($112.00!!), got what I needed, and went back to the car.
HOLY HELL!
It snowed ALOT in the 45 minutes we were in the store. My car was covered.
Well, we start home.
I am passing the movie theater, and suddenly my car is all CLUNK-WHAP-CRACK-WHOMP-KUPLUNTH-KUBLUNK

WHAT THE..........????????!!!!!!!!!!

I slowed down.
I could not see out of my back window, because of the snow.
So, I look in my side mirror.
I could not see anything.
Then... I could see something (mind you, I am pulled over, and looking behind me with my side mirror)through the lights of the cars far off in the road. Limping.
Its a dog.
A big dog. A Lab or a Retreiver.
"OH NO" I yell.
Grace says "What Mom? WHAT?"
"I just totally hit a dog. Shoot. Shoot. Shoot." (PG version)
((Just a thought that entered my mind now.....why am I saving the PG version for you...those who choose to read this, adults...rather than being PG with my daughters 7 year old ears....THAT is an AH HA moment for me. I will do better. ))

Ahhhh....I need to go back and make sure it doesnt get hit again. Poor dog. DAMNIT!! Ugh.
Ok.
So, I turn around.
Going slow.
Snowing like CRAZY!!
I cant see well at all.
Where is it?
I dont see....CLUNK-CRACK-THUD-THUNK-WOMP.....
SHIT!
SHIT!
SHIT!
SHIT!

I JUST HIT THE DOG AGAIN!!!!

I AM NOT LYING!!
I went to go check on the dog that I hit, get it out of the road, see if it has tags, whatever I can do.....AND I HIT IT AGAIN!!!!

So I pulled over...AGAIN.
Rolled down my window. I cant see it.
I cant see it anywhere.
Then I call my husband and yell to him... "I JUST HIT A DOG.....TWO TIMES!!"

"What, you hit two dogs?!"

Now as bad as it is to hear about or to actually hit a dog....that may have sounded better....hitting 2 different dogs.

"NO, THE SAME FREAKING DOG"!!!!

Oy.

So then I look again, and I can see it lying in the road.
I tell Tye I am going to go see if it can get up. Then I look again, and no lie, it was gone.

Where the hell did it go?

Tye says, "Alisa, JUST GO HOME!!"

There was no way in hell I was going to turn back around on that road to go home.
So I went through the neighborhood.
I couldn't hit the dog 3 times!!!

So, I call Animal Control, and tell them about it. They said they would go out there.
Grace asked me if I was going to have to go to Dog Court and talk to Priest.
I think she meant Judge.

I was so afraid to go past there today and see fur or blood on the road this morning.

But there was none.

I am sorry doggy.

I love these girls

2009-11-20T15:24:00.000-07:00

I just wanted to post some pictures of my sister and her cute girls.
I am so grateful for Anna.
Truly.
She is amazing.
Over the last couple of days the whole tasing incident has been in the news again.
And this is not over.
She is UH-MAZING.
I know I have posted it before, but she is truly one of the strongest, grounded and clear people in my life.
I know she doesnt feel that way all the time, but she really is.
I love her.
I love her a lot.

All you have to do is look at her or meet her, and you know what I am talking about.

I love this picture

I mentioned back in June that I needed to post some pictures of Ava (the cutest little pixie in the world)

Here she is...... Flashdancer.....

And of coarse, Baby Bella. I LOVE to snuggle her. She falls right asleep with her head nestled in my cleavage. :)

I just love these girls.

I was really wishing badly last night that I was with my sister in California and my parents house. I just wanted to be near her. Scratch her back. Rub her head.

Thats all.

-A

2009-11-09T19:29:00.000-07:00

Looks like I felt like blogging....

I have not blogged for a LONG time. It seems that I have started the previous 2 entries with that statement......this seems to be my trend. Man, it's a good thing I dont get paid for this.

So, I am sure that there are a ton-o-things that have happened that I could blog about, but nothing that is so exciting that it warrants the 5 pages it would take.

Lets see, I think I told you about Vegas and skinny dipping on the last entry.

Then, the first week of October, I went to San Francisco to have a kick ass weekend with one of my favorite people.

Emily

Have I told you that I love her? Cuz I do. She truly is one of my favoritistest people in the world.

So, I hop on a flight to SF. I get in at like 1 pm. Emily came in from Sacramento to get me. I was SO excited to see her and have an adventure with her. (She is ANYTHING but dull, count on a good time with her)

So, we head into the city. I mention to her "Really..... I am STARVING."

She agrees, she is hungry too.

She suggests a cool little Indian place. Take out, cash only.

So, after a few wrong left turns and right turns, we find it.

SUWEET! Parking right in front of the place. (Parking in SF is a JOKE)

We are getting our stuff out of the car, I grab my wallet, click the lock to lock the door and we shut our doors.

Emily turns, just as her door is shutting...(in slow motion, it seems) "Noooo.....wwwaaaiiiittttt.....sssshhhhoooooootttt".

Yup, keys locked in the car.

Here I was, trying to be responsible, and just assumed that Emily wanted to lock her car in the big ole city of San Francisco.

Well, you know what they say about assume..... it makes and ASS out of U and ME. I think in this case, it only made the ass out of me.

Well, we decide to go in and get some food, and call a locksmith.

Food: Hello Heaven...... I will have the lamb.

YUMM-O (so sorry for the RR reference. Promise I will not say EVOO)

Em got the homemade cottage cheese with mango or something.

Oh My! I just need to let her order my food for me from now on.

Oh wait...no I dont. My sticky rise and mango will come short of the sweetened condensed milk and mango. (That is later)

So, we get a phone book, find Locksmith, and seriously call the first one that we see.

He said that he can come for $75.00.

"Nope", she says. "I can have my room mate come."

$50.00?

Ok, $50.00.

So we eat, and we wait. Its take out only. So where do we eat? Well, on the curb of Fulmer and 4th Avenue of coarse. And I literally mean THE CURB.

About 45 minutes later, they pull up.

This small, quite little Asian man, and this LOUD, big Black guy.

(The following is just the truth and has NOTHING to do with Race, gender, religion, or sexual preference......its just what happened)

Here they come, we say hello. We point to the car and they get to work.

The quiet little Asian guy (we will call him Bob) puts this balloon type of thing with a pump in between the window and the frame. He starts pumping it up to get some room between the frame and the window.

So, as Bob is working on the window, the big, loud, black guy (We will call him Jay-Z) starts talking to us. He has seriously about 7 teeth....all in the back of his mouth.

In reference to Emily watching her door shut, in slow motion, knowing that her keys were going to get locked in the car, Jay-Z starts telling us how he has the same experience, but with $300.00 and a toilet......

"Um...what?" I ask.

"How do you actually flush $300.00 down a toilet......on accident?"

"Well", he proceeds with his story.

"See, I had $300.00 cash on my table. Then, there was a knock on my door. I looked through the peep hole to see who it was. It was one of my friends. *But I didnt want this friend to know that I had $300.00. *So, I waded the money up in a bunch of napkins. We sat and talked for while. Then we decided we were hungry. So we ordered some delivery. We got done eating and my friend was getting ready to leave. I told him to wait, I wanted to clean up really quick. *So I grabbed all the napkins and I flushed the napkins down the toilet. And as they were heading down the toilet, swirling down the bowl....I remembered that I waded up the money into some of the napkins. I yelled 'Nooooooooooooooo' and tried to get my hands in there before they made it down the hole...but I was too late."

He must have noticed the very perplexed, and confused stare on my face.

He asked "What, you dont believe me?"

"Actually", I say "I just have a few questions"..... (See the * in the story above)

*1- Why do you have friends or anyone in your life that you dont want to know you have $300.00?

His response- You dont?

Uh...No Jay-Z. I dont.

*2- When you have money that you dont want out, why is your first thought NOT to put it in your pocket? Who thinks "Quick, hide the cash in some napkins?"

His response- "I didnt have any pockets."

K, not interested if he was wearing any pants or not....

*3-When cleaning up ones mess after dinner, WHO FLUSHES THE NAPKINS DOWN THE TOILET???? Did you eat in the bathroom??

His response- Uhhhhhh......

Yeah, that prally means you DID eat in the bathroom.....

I feel really good now that I understand how he can really relate to me and Em and the situation at hand. Truly.

In the mean time, Bob is having a really hard time with the window pumper and the stick he has trying to get the lock, unlocked.

So Jay-Z decides to step in.....and we have all just been made very aware how smart Jay-Z is....hand the job over to him.

He gets a slim jim. Ahhh yeah... the trusty ole Slim-Jim.

He shoves it down between the window and the door.

Up and down, to the left, to the right....

TADA....unlocked.

So time to pay. Em hand him her card. His portable card charger is not working. He will not take a check, and I DID NOT want to give him cash.

But....cash it is.

Ugh. So I give him $50.00. (This WAS, after all, my fault)

And away they go.

We are off too.

So, you may be asking "Alisa, why didnt you want to give them cash?"

Well, I will tell you why.....About 3 hours later when we were heading to the park for the first evening of Hardly Strictly Blue Grass Emily tried rolling down her window. CLANK-SCRATCH-SCREETCH-CLONK. Yeah, not how a window should sound that ISNT effed up.

Then, when we go to park the car, she cant unlock her door.

THIS is why I didnt want to pay them cash. CC transaction.....canceled. THAT easy!!

Anyway, Window and door still being difficult. And it took and act of God to get the grease from Jay-Z's face off her wind shield. Again, I only speak truth.

So we had a REALLY good time at the bluegrass festival.

This is Lyle Lovett and his Big Church Band..

Oh, how I love Lyle Lovett. He is so not sexy, but his voice is.

Time to head out. We will be back on Saturday and Sunday for some more music festival.....and some serious contact high....

We were hungry again. We passed an Ethiopian place. Mmmmm..... but again, parking.

So Em pulls up to a Pizza by the Slice place. I hop out and get 2 slices of Pesto pizza with Garlic and Feta cheese. OMG!!

We drive a few streets over until we find somewhere to park and eat.

We are eating, talking and laughing. Then Em tells me, "man, I have got to pee soooooo bad. Seriously, I cant hold it."

She looks around...."I will just pee next to the car...IN THE GUTTER.."

"WHAT?" I ask.

"Serious Alisa, I bet so many people have peed in this gutter..."

Do I NEED to point out the obvious in this statement? The part that screams DONT PEE IN THE GUTTER!!!

No matter. Em will do what she needs to do.

So I say "At least open the back door so you have some sort of cubicle..."

Bravo Alisa...Bravo!

She has to wait a few seconds for people who DONT pee in the gutters to walk by. Then before I know it, pants down, Em squatting in the gutter. Peed, up, pants on, buttoned, done! And not a moment too soon.

"Hello passer-byers.....lovely night, isnt it?"

Then I look about 25 feet up the street....."Um, Em....that looks like a porta-potty."

So it is.

But that doesnt give one the same experience as peeing in the gutter.

So the next day was a FULL day of music, running from stage to stage, yummy food and sun.

What a GREAT day.

Just so you know, this is not a relaxing day. There are 4 stages that we are trying to get to and from. We have our blankets set out at each stage to save our place.

But all the heat, the fighting the crowds, the walking, walking, walking......all of it was worth it, just for this video....

Seriously, this kid was SO funny!!!

The next morning, I woke up SO tired, sore and sun burned.

I BEGGED Em, PLEASE dont make me go all day long.

Lets see some other parts of San Francisco. This was only my second time there

So we decided to head somewhere outside of the city to get some breakfast. We ended up in Sausalito.

Then, as if it were meant to be, we found a really quaint and cute breakfast place.

When we were seated, we were seated with 2 other couples. None of us knew each other. We started talking with the sweetest older couple from Chicago. We laughed, told stories, guessed each others ages, and talked about how the wife (cant remember her name) was a wino. And Stewart.....or was it Douglas?...finally got it right with his 3rd wife (the one sitting at the table).

It was such a great morning.

Then we decided to head to The Muir Woods Redwood Forest.

These redwoods are HUGE!!

Did you know that they cant get diseased? Pretty crazy.

This picture was so against the rules.....

We were so ready to come upon a little hobbit village within one of the trees.

Now, these were not the "Drive your RV through the Tree" Redwoods...but they were HUGE!!

Then later that evening, we went back to watch a couple of shows. Neko Case was great.

I think that my favorite was Gillian Welch, especially when Emmylou Harris came on stage with her.

The biggest bummer is when we missed Robert Plant with Emmylou Harris and Buddy Miller.

And dont think that we ended the weekend with out Emily peeing in public again. Oh no..... not just in a gutter this time.....in someones FRONT YARD!

Em...I think you need to get that checked out. :)

So......that is the most exciting thing that has happened since October 1st.

Oh, and I jumped on the HCG wagon.

30 days, 30 pounds.

Its good.

All I have is some before and mid-way-through bra and undies pictures....so, no, you cant see them.

I am going to go snuggle my girl and watch The Simpsons.

Bye Bye

-A

I cant make this stuff up.....

2009-09-18T10:56:00.000-06:00

On one hand, I sort of feel like I should apologize for not blogging in SO LONG!
But on the other hand (my left) I don't. Since I only have a handful of followers.
At any rate....I am blogging now.
Man, I feel like so much has happened in the last month and a half....Oh wait....A TON HAS HAPPENED!!

Now, what I am about to write will not be in the order of which they happened.

THE MOST EXCITING!!!

Baby Bella is here!
Man, we have been waiting for her.
She is ADORABLE!
So let me just say this. I love my sister so deeply. Anna is my hero. To some extent, she always has been. Many, many reasons.
Can I just tell you, that she brought this angel into our world all-nachur-al..??!! ( I know that is not how it is spelled...but it should be)
She was UH-MAZING!
Check into the hospital at 7:30 a.m. Light contractions. Little bit-o pit. Progress a little bit more.
Break the water. YOWZAS! Take off the pit. More contractions...the really hurty kind.
What a wonderful bonding experience it was for me to assist her and coach her in the process.
Remember to breath....in deep, out like blowing up a balloon...concentrate......keep pace....don't hold it.....make it audible.....you are doing great..... (Lights low, and the comforting music of her brother in law Paul Cardall)
She had to deal with A LOT of stinky breath.
At one point, I had Kristin take my place so she could help her out too.
I went and had some chips and guac. (NOT a good idea)
Then back over to help with the breathing....first big exhale in poor Anna's face...."WHO JUST ATE???!!!" says Anna.
"So sorry....I'm outta here" I say.
Erin is to my rescue with Tic Tacs to which Anna says "Everyone needs them...."
We ate them all.
Nurse....she feels as though she wants to push.
Onto the bed....check. You are ready sister. Time to have baby.
Here comes Dr. (who by the way was WAY better than my Dr that was found under a bridge somewhere, I am sure)
K sister, push.
Once
Twice
Three times
and
Four....SHES HERE!!

I am the proudest Auntie and Sister.
So amazing.

Bella Aspen Cardall
Born: September 16, 2009 at 5:36 p.m.
7 Lbs 2 Oz
18 inches long

She has her daddy's chin and mouth.
Thank you B!

Her sister L-O-V-E-S her!! I have pics, and will post them later tonight.
She loves to hold her and giver her Eskimo kisses.

Ok, here is another UH-MAZING Story!

Anna's brother in law, Paul Cardall had been on the heart transplant list for over a year. In August, he moved into the hospital.
Well, on September 9th, he got his new heart.
What an amazing thing.
He has been such an inspiration to so many people who he knows, and those that he has never met.
September 9th was such a roller coaster day for me.
It was also the 3 month anniversary of Brian's death.
How amazing that on that day, the brother that Brian has loved so fiercely his entire life and beyond, gets his life.
Brian has been working so hard over there.
I believe that.
I know it.
I am so happy for Paul's family. Mostly for his wife Lynette and their little daughter Eden.

Now....
On September 5th, we celebrated my Dad's 70th birthday.
I can not believe that my Dad is 70!
Tye and I got to put together a video for him with pictures of him through out his life.
What an honor.
As we worked on it until 2 in the morning and watched it, it really hit me.
I was having a really hard time with this.
Tye and I could not help crying through this video.
And not just the one time.
Every time we watched it. We had tears.
I realized how thankful I am for my dad.
He has ALWAYS been the hardest worker I have ever known.
He is 70, and only now is slowing down cuz the Dr. told him to.
And his "slow down" is double what a normal person would do.
He is the bestest Dad in the world and he has taught me invaluable, life long lessons.
I love you Dad!

On September 11th, I flew into Vegas for a girls weekend.
Me, Joni, Nancy, McKell, Sonnie, Megan and Elizabeth celebrated Joni's 40th Birthday!
It was so freakin sweet!!
Jayson and Pam Orvis are so gracious. SO SO SO GRACIOUS. It blows my mind.
They let us stay in their beautiful home.
And it was perfect.
Our days were filled with talking, eating, and floating in the pool.
It was such a wonderful way to celebrate Joni!
Thank you to the women that came and most thanks to Jayson and Pam.

Oh man!!
I NEED to tell you my "Violation of my purple circle of personal space at the Brandi Carlile concert story"......
But I really don't think that I can convey it appropriately in text. It must either be in person, or on the phone.

Really, you want to hear this.

So call me!!

And finally, a Grace story....

Grace is in tumbling. She has been for a few years. She LOVES it.
There is a girl in her class that she does NOT like.
Her name is Naomi, and I gotta tell ya, she is pretty annoying. And I don't mind saying so.
So as we were leaving tumbling yesterday, she asks me and Tye if she should tell Naomi how she feels about her.
I say, "Well, hun, I think you should just let yourself know. No one likes to be told that someone doesn't like them"....
To which she says....."Oh...No mom...I don't 'Not like' her.... I HATE HER! She is my ARCH ENEMY....."

I might add that she contains her enmity well.....

XOXOXO

Alisa

My connection to the MOB and other things.....

2009-08-02T21:13:00.000-06:00

I have not blogged for a while.

No excuses.

Just havent.

At first I wondered "Does anyone even read these?"

But then I thought..... "I dont know that I care if they do."

Yeah, truth is, most of the reason that I post anything is because I just want to write something.

And there IS the other part of, I hope people read it and take something from it.

Whether it is new music (YAY!) or a laugh, or a new way of thinking.

Or maybe just seeing into me a little more when I hurt.

Anyway.

Tye is in Hawaii. YAY for him. He has an amazing job. Yes, He is in Hawaii for his JOB. He is on the island of Lanai, he is SCUBA diving, and on a boat in the middle of the ocean. AND THIS IS HIS JOB!! Man, we really are blessed for him to have the job that he has. To work for the man that he does. Not only because he gets to do amazing things, but his "employer" loves him and values him. I am happy for him when he gets to go do amazing things and it is "work".

BUT, I miss him.

This trip has been harder than the others . (He has been on many)

This is the first trip since Brian died. And I find myself thinking "This is what it would be like everyday with him gone".

Now, dont get me wrong, I do not and will not claim to know what Anna is going through, simply because my husband is out of town. I dont. I dont ever want to.

But it still takes me to a sad place.

Last Monday, I slept at my moms house with Anna so I could go with her to her Drs. appointment.

Anna and I laid in her bed after Ava had gone to sleep. We talked about Brian, we talked about how to move forward, we talked about her dreams.

Man, this hurts.

I couldn't do anything for my sweet sister as she was crying, telling me that she REALLY wishes that she could just be in a coma. To please, wake her up when I think the hurt might not be so big. When I think she may be able to breathe deeper.

All I could do is rub her head, let her cry, and tell her what I absolutely know to be one of the truest things I know....."Anna, you can do this...."

And it is so true.

Anna, you can do this. I love you!

On Saturday night, my sister Erin came up to my house to be with Grace while I went to a friends birthday party.

Erin is such a great aunt! She is such a great sister!

She took Grace to go see Ice Age the Dawn of the Dinosaurs.......brave girl.

WHAT A SNOOZER!!

Yes, Grace and I have already seen it. Grace LOVES it and wanted to see it again. But I was NOT willing to go see it again. So Erin got the job. But she actually liked it.

She slept in my bed with me. And I slept like S%&T!! I had stressful dreams that seemed so surface. I dont feel like I slept at all. I wondered if Erin had slept at all cuz she was sleeping so quietly. She got up at about 415 to go potty and get a drink of water.

When she got back into bed, I asked her if she had slept. She had! I am glad!. But then we stayed awake and talked until about 6 or so. Then we both went back to sleep. the net 3 1/2 hours of sleep I got was SO MUCH better than the previous 4.

It was fun to have her here.

So the birthday celebration for Megan on Saturday was nice. It was at Olivia and Wendy's house in Centerville. It was really nice. Beautiful back yard and wonderful company.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MEGAN! I love you and I am grateful for you!

Ok, so a funny Grace story......

A few weeks ago, Grace and I were on our way to school. We were pulling into the gas station and Grace said (in a small, shy voice)

-"Mom.....I have been hiding something from you..."

**Well, ok honey, seems like you want to tell me about it. What is it?

-"Awwww....I dont want to tell you...I am afraid I will get into trouble..."

I tell her that I will never get angry at her for telling me the truth.

BUT that doesnt mean that there will not be consequences for her actions.

(Depending on what she is telling on herself about)

She musters up the courage and says.....

-"So, there is this girl Mary at our school......and, there was this one day that she said something that I didnt like......but I dont remember what it was...."

**Ok, I say. Then what happened?

-"Oh mom" she says "I am not proud of it...."

**Well, go ahead and tell me.

-"Well, I got mad at what she said.......so......."

**Yeah?

-"I yelled at the other kids...'GET MARY!!!!!!'.." (As she shoves her fist in the air)

**WHAT?

**What did the other kids do when you "commanded" them to "Get Mary"?

-"They all ran up to her and started kicking her, pinching her and hitting her...."

Uhhhhhhhh........

**Grace, what were you doing as they "Got Mary"?

-"I watched them."

**You didnt join them?

-"No, just watched them"

Uh....ok.....So......do you feel bad about goin all Soprano's on Mary's ass?

Ok, so I didnt ask her in THAT way.....

I asked

**Why do you think it was ok to tell all those kids to hurt Mary?

-"I dont think it is ok mom. I feel really bad".

**Well, Grace, just imagine if Mary did that to you. And all the kids "got" you. I can imagine that you would come home, probably cry in my arms asking me 'mom, why dont they like me, how come they treated me like this...whats wrong with me?'

And I would hold you and tell you that I love you and that I am sorry that other people feel like they needed to treat you so poorly. But you are an amazing little girl.

-"ugh....mom.....I really do feel bad...."

**Well, I guess today you get to make it right with her. You can apologize to her at school today.

-"No i cant.....she moved to Arizona...."

**Well, I guess you can write her a letter. I will make sure that it gets to her. How old is Mary anyway?

-12

**12????!!!!!!

**You got a bunch of kids from 6-11 to get all Guido on a 12 year old....and you sat and watched....?????!!!!!

Well, she is a leader....not a follower....I guess I like that. I am not a follower either...not when it doesnt work for me. And her dad certainly isnt either.

We just need to direct this "leadership" in a more productive, less mob fashion.

Cross my fingers.

Whats in my head.....

2009-07-25T23:58:00.000-06:00

Ok.

I seriously would marry this song and make babies with it if I could.

I LOVE IT!!!

Here are the lyrics and it is the first one on my playlist.

Give it a listen. If you love me, you will. (I am aware of manipulation tactics)

There are actually 2 different songs on the one track, but just listen to first one.

Well, you can listen to both.

But I am not in love with the second one like I am with this one.

THIS is why I love Brandi Carlile

Again Today-

Broken sticks and broken stones
Will turn to dust just like our bones
It's words that hurt the most now isn't it
Are you sad inside, are you home alone
If I could just pick up the phone
Maybe you could see a better day
And you won't waste away
under my watchful eye
Because I'm your hero and you're my weakness

Who's gonna break my fall
When the spinning starts
The colors bleed together and fade
Was it ever there at all
Or have I lost my way
The path of least resistance
Is catching up with me again today

-----I LOVE THIS PART-----

****I'm broken down, not good enough
The broken promises add up
To twice their weight in tears which I have caused****

I'm afraid to sink, I'm afraid to swim
I'm sad to say I miss my friends
I know that I'm supposed to step away
But they need me to stay and keep a watchful eye
On all my heroes and all their demons

But who's gonna break my fall
When the spinning starts
The colors bleed together and fade
Was it ever there at all
Or have I lost my way
The path of least resistance
Is catching up with me again
Not today
Not today

Was it ever there at all
And have I lost my way
The path of least resistance
Is catching up with me again today

Broken sticks and broken stones
Will turn to dust just like our bones again today
I'm broken down
Not good enough
The broken promises add up again today

Was it ever there at all
And have I lost my way
The path of least resistance
Is catching up with me again today
Again today

ISNT THAT FREAKING AWESOME????

K, this next song (and the second one on my playlist as well) is the reason why I ever fell in love with Brandi. I have history with this song and represents someone very particular.

Long is the day, take it away
Hold it up and you don't let it fall
Cause devils play, was yesterday
And I don't care about that at all

I just smile, once in a while
Because I don't want the lines on my face
I sit right here, holding the years
And I count all the stars in space

You fall apart again and you can find a friend
Don't turn to someone else because they won't understand...

Self respect, goes unexpressed
I don't dream because I cannot sleep
And I think the world of myself
But the world doesn't think much of me
***FAVORITE PART IN THE SONG***
As long as the day is full of time, there will always be room
for your hand in mine

You fall apart again and you can't find a friend
Don't turn to someone else because they won't understand
I don't want to hear
You say that you miss yesterday
If you don't like what you see
That means nothing to me

****Kick ass Guitar time******

No one's home I'm alone with my music and my tv
And I still say that yesterday is best when left to sleep

You fall apart again and you can't find a friend
Don't turn to someone else because they won't understand
I don't want to hear
You say that you miss yesterday
If you don't like what you see
That means nothing to me

OH MAN!!! I just LOVE Brandi! Listen to her other stuff on here. She is AMAZING!!!!

Whew!

-Alisa

Confessions of the 3rd kind......

2009-07-17T13:46:00.000-06:00

Ready.....set......go!

1- Last night I made Tilapia with broccoli, green beans and green onions. I made a great conscious effort in eating healthy. And, it was good! I LOVE TO EAT HEALTHY! So....what did I have for lunch?? Oy.....(bowing my head and shaking it in shame....I cant even look at you.) Del Taco. DEL TACO IS NASTY!! But I still had a fish taco, a hard taco and a soft taco. And now, it is in the bottom of my belly laughing and pointing at me calling me a looser and a sucker. I shake my fist at you nasty food!!

2- I was supposed to get us packed for Island Park last night. We are leaving today. Grace was going to help me and I was going to further teach her about responsibility and team work. The way it played out in my head was so great!! But, since these are confessions..... I know you smart little cookies can guess that did not happen.
Nope, it didn't. I folded one load of laundry, layed on the couch and watched "Hes just not that in to you". You would think that I would encourage my girl to go outside and ride her scooter or go see if her friends can play. But I didn't. She asked if she could watch Twilight in my room.....my answer....Yes. Rot your brain with the fantasy of a sexy vampire that puts all the human men to shame. Oh, your 7 year old brain..... Yeah, I am making my nomination for mother of the year award really easy....

3-As I was watching "He's Just Not That In To You", a lllliiiiiiiitttttllllllleeee bit of drool escaped from the corner of my mouth any time Ben Affleck came onto the screen. And I even shushed my husband when it shows Ben washing the dishes. I really wish I was lying.

4- I cant air this one....it is too embarrassing.

5-My girls room is a complete disaster.

6-I have no desire to change that in the near future.

7-I am the one that drank all of the Orange Fanta that was in the fridge. Its gone, so move on already!!

8-I wish I was more like Emily.

9-I am as straight as a fence post, but Brandi Carlile is HOT!

10-It will be a while before I do "That" again. (No, you aren't supposed to know what I am talking about)

On a more tender note.

I came across an article about this company. Check out the website. Some people think it is morbid. But as you read the thoughts of the photographers and the parents, it is so touching.

PRESS ME RIGHT HERE

Have a fabulous weekend!

-Adidaloysee

Is this thing on...??

2009-07-15T21:12:00.000-06:00

Migraines.....I dot get them much. And when I do, I can generally intercept them in time. It starts with a little twinge in my vision. If I can get something into my system then, then I should be ok.

Today was different.

But, what matters is it is gone now. Whew!

So, did I ever tell you how funny Grace is? If you know her, you may have an idea. Even if you don't, you may have an idea through someone who does.

We kind of having a running joke in our little family because of a comment Grace made late one night.

Grace and I sometimes have "Sleep overs". It is when she sleeps on her floor and I sleep on her bed. Well, one night we were having one of these. She has the glow in the dark stars on her ceiling and a lava lamp in her room (among LOADS of toys she never uses, but clutter the floor). So the soft light coming from the two was nice.

I cant even remember what I was thinking, but it was something that I thought was funny.

So I ask Grace as I am looking up at the ceiling.... "Grace, ya know what's funny?" (With a chuckle)

And with out skipping a beat and no emotion on her face, or in her voice, what-so-ever, she replies.............

"Midgets"

I laughed and laughed and laughed.
Grace? Well, she sat there, still, no emotion on her face. More like she was pondering the question and then her answer.

So, to this day, whenever Grace asks me or Tye. "Hey, know what's funny?"..... Yup....."MIDGETS" we say.

K, I am super excited about the end result of this:

On Monday evening as we were eating a fabulous gourmet dinner of Hot Dogs and BBQ beans, our doorbell rang. Well, it was one of two people. Graces friend that is our neighbor, or our neighbor that we lovingly call Grandpa, from across the street.

I answer the door.....neither.

It was a cute younger boy....say 18 or so. He was wondering if we wanted to try their dairy home delivery.

Well, let me tell you.....I have been wanting to do this forever!! But apparently, it is WAY more inconvenient for me to call them up than it is for me to go to freaking Wal-Mart 3 times a week. I know you feel me.

Anyway, this was for a dairy that is out of Morgan. A small family owned business. I like that idea and I am willing to buy what you are selling. Plus, it is all organic!

So, after I gave him the complicated order of:

1/2 Gallon of 1% and 1/2 gallon of 2 % every other week, a dozen eggs every other week, but not on the same week of the milk, 2 lb bag of shredded cheese once a month, and a 1 lb block of colby jack once a month, but not on the same week of the shredded cheese or the eggs....

My husband offered him a hot dog.

He paused for about 1/2 second and replied- " I would love a hot dog...."

Quite honestly, I was waiting for him to say "But I cant accept food from a kind and gracious client"..... Or... "But I really have to get going...."

He continued with "I have been doing this for 2 years, and no one has ever even offered me a drink!" Well, my dear, The Boulters arent "no one" :)

I was so happy that he accepted our offer for a hot dog. My husband is pretty cute. Actually, he is pretty smokin' hot.

So, we get him his hot dog, and he says he can go get a 1/2 gallon of milk for us to sample for $1.00. Ok. Sounds great. "Have you any chocolate milk?" I ask. (Well, not just like that)

"yeah, I will get you some of that too"

So he comes back with those and I notice that there is another boy in the milk van.

I ask our new little friend if the other one would like a hot dog as well.

He yells across the street to him, he gets out and starts walking over.

"Yes", he says. "I would love one."

Then I got his order.

Mayo, Ketchup, Mustard, Cheese, Onion and Tomato.

Oh La la....a man after my own hot Dog heart. That is EXACTLY how I like them.

So I go into my kitchen to get him one....

Problem- The hot dogs that we cooked are gone....

Solution- There are more in the fridge and the grill takes only a minute.

I just told him that I was reheating it on the grill

Then, I went for the hot dog buns.....

Problem- There were no more in the bag!!!

Solution- Used the one that dropped on the floor. IT WAS ONLY FOR 3 SECONDS!! I COUNTED!! However, with everything that I was putting on the hot dog, he would be none the wiser....

So I get the hot dog ready for him and take it to him. And he was so grateful, and so smiley.

They were such cute young men. Really. Actually, the second one was kinda hot. And he even had braces!! I bet he was about 22 or 23...... which means when I was his age...he was..... 9 or 10..!!! Ew, Ew, EW!!....Nevermind......no hotness there.

I just have cute little milk men now.

-Alisa

** This is in no way is meant to be insensitive to little people, or milkmen, or little people that are milkmen. So if you choose to be offended, ok."**

P.S.- I decided that I HATE Phineus and Pherb WAY more than I hate Spongebob.

2009-07-13T13:14:00.000-06:00

K. I hope this doesn't make me a stalker.
I really dont want to be.
But this is the story.
We all know Mimi Rogers. Well, except for those of you who don't.
I knew Mimi and her family many many years ago while I lived in South Jordan with my family. I went to high school with her brother Jake. My brother Matt was cute friends with her brother Sam and my brother Erik was friends with her brother....shoot...I cant remember his name! Younger than Jake, older than Sam....am I totally off here? FOUND IT! Pete!! Or was it the other way around? I cant remember. It WAS 14 years ago since I lived there last. Sheesh! GET OFF ME! :)

So I am rambling.

Anyway, through Mimi, I have been following her sister in laws blog. She is married to Jake. She has no clue who I am. Not at all. But I love her blog.
She is super funny, super gorgeous, and seems like a genuine person.
Anyway, I am just posting this on here because I really dig her blog, and I think you will too. So I think you should look at it. :)

http://www.reagansblob.com/

Bye Bye

-A